Rooney Begs Fergie Put Me In Goal!

Wayne Rooney, Manchester United's best player by a million miles, has had a heart-to-heart conversation with Sir Alex Ferguson and begged the legendary manager to let him play in goal.

Sir Alex Revealed all in this statement:

Young Wayne came to see me. He's a fabulous lad and I know he looks at me like a second father".

Anyway, the lad said that he realised we were having problems in defence and that he had a sensational tactical idea which would instantly cure it.

So I told the boy, I told him that it was possible that both Rio and Nemanja were coming to the end of their time at Old Trafford.

I patted him on the head and told him these things happen but that everyone will be alright in the end because we're all filthy rich thanks to being so successful.

Then Wayne started to cry. He said that if I picked him to play in goal, he would make a good job of being the last line of defence. Then he would run down the other end and score us a goal. Then he'd run back again and make a brilliant save. Then finally he'd chase back upfield to score a brilliant 30 yarder which would win the goal of the season prize and would ensure a 2-0 win.

He said he'd do this every week so long as Rio and Nemanja could stay at the club and still be his best friends.

So I said yes. I have to say just for once I agree with the lad. So don't be surprised when you read next week's teamsheet.