Cheryl Cole, X Factor and What It All Means

Cheryl Cole has to dance or the world will stop turning.

How so?

Well, the simple answer is that when Cheryl Cole stops dancing or reduces her dancing quotient the world goes into recession.

CC hasn't danced much lately, so the world slipped into a recession.

But yesterday, she danced a lot on the X-Factor.

So here's a tip: buy shares, buy property - the world has just turned c/o Cheryl Cole and we should be moving out of recession into a bull market.

If Cheryl Cole dances like she has to dance to put food on the table - then this is a signal to buy stocks and shares BIG TIME.

But if Cheryl Cole dances like a sinking brick - SELL OUT - fast as you can.

In fact, if the world really did revolve around Cheryl Cole - what a simpler world it would be.

We would all know when it's going to rain or shine, when stocks are going to go up or down, when Obama will make a decision or dither like he's doing right now.

So, it makes sense to carry an electric prod to give Cheryl a prod whenever she stops dancing.

Chefs in kitchens once used small dogs running in a circular contraption to turn a spit to cook the roast evenly. If the dog stopped running, the chef would typically put some hot coals under the bottom of the contraption to force the dog to keep its feet in the air by running faster. This was cruel, but the master of the house did not come down on the chef if the meat was cooked evenly and properly.

We need Cheryl to keep the earth turning - to provide high employment and serve the nation. This is "what it means" and provides an explanation beyond "42" (In re Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy).