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Saturday, 2 May 2009

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A Mexican man from Boogertown is recovering in the Booger Green hospital after the control unit on his electric booboo stretcher shorted out and caught on fire, according to the Boogertown Fire Department. An interpreter told the Boogertown Banner that Jose Carralas is recovering and is simply thankful that he already had 17 kids before he was ruined.

Meanwhile, Boogertown's own Brother Verber has been hiding out in a cave somewhere in Pine Knob in Snotgrass County after several widows and old maids discovered that the old gent has been able to put away some half a million dollars over the past 30 years, somehow. Verber went on the run after declaring a vow of "celebrity" that he wants to announce here in this column and on the front page of next week's issue of the Boogertown Banner.

Well-wishers gathered at Vanderbilt Hospital in Nashville, Tennessee Saturday morning as Booger County High School teacher Miss Vanilla Mae Snell, who claims she is 39, underwent her ninth face lift. Miss Snell has also donated her extra skin over the past 30 years to a group that makes pairs of cowboy boots with it and gives them to needy children in Guatemala.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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