This forum does not allow guest posting. You must register to participate in this forum.

Messages ordered by earliest posts first
All times are GMT

Forum Home / General Discussion / Bad news for your pet for 2011


[This topic is LOCKED]

AuthorMessage
Bureau
This user is offline Snippet Zoner
Bureau

Registered: 6 Sep 08

 Forum Profile
 Writer's Profile
Posted: 11 Jan 11 13:36

Bad news for your pet for 2011:


Cat: Rocking chairs make huge comeback!

Squirrel: Will have no success at finding hidden nuts that are bound to be around vet clinic grounds somewhere.

Hamster: News release that 10,000 hamsters on wheels will provide whole house with electricity and hamster food can be cheap if bought in bulk China.

Sometimes the light's all shinin' on me;
Other times I can barely see.
Lately it occurs to me, What a long, strange trip it's been.
Charpa93
This user is offline Writer
Charpa93

Registered: 17 Jul 09

 Forum Profile
 Writer's Profile
 Email
 Website
Posted: 11 Jan 11 13:43

Quote: Bureau

Bad news for your pet for 2011:


Cat: Rocking chairs make huge comeback!

Squirrel: Will have no success at finding hidden nuts that are bound to be around vet clinic grounds somewhere.

Hamster: News release that 10,000 hamsters on wheels will provide whole house with electricity and hamster food can be cheap if bought in bulk China.


Love how your brain works.

The price of Kibble is going way up. Old Roy, however, remains unusually cheap.

Vets just announce that animals should be eating more vegetables, especially spinach.

Bureau
This user is offline Snippet Zoner
Bureau

Registered: 6 Sep 08

 Forum Profile
 Writer's Profile
Posted: 11 Jan 11 18:45
Dog: Half-asleep, overhears owner saying that tomorrow they are taking him to be "tutored". (*With apologies to Gary Larson.)

Cat: Overhears "We're bringing home a little Rottweiler puppy for puss to play with. Won't he be excited?"

Dog: New super-strong in-ground electric invisible fence also will make it easier for owner to find where he craps and scoop it.



Sometimes the light's all shinin' on me;
Other times I can barely see.
Lately it occurs to me, What a long, strange trip it's been.
Abel Rodriguez
This user is offline Ready and Abel
Abel Rodriguez

Location: USA
Registered: 7 Jul 04

 Forum Profile
 Writer's Profile
Posted: 11 Jan 11 19:11
  • A vet in Poland discovers a new inexpensive way to neuters dogs but it requires going in through the mouth with a pair of scissors.


queen mudder
This user is offline Spoof Queen
queen mudder

Location: london and nyc
Registered: 26 May 04

 Forum Profile
 Writer's Profile
 Website
Posted: 11 Jan 11 19:14

Quote: Bureau
Cat: Overhears "We're bringing home a little Rottweiler puppy for puss to play with. Won't he be excited?"



Ha. If it was my Maine Coon, who's larger that the average Jack Russell/Corgi/Spaniel etc, he'd make mincemeat of a pup.



Gravity is a myth, the earth sux?
Lynton
This user is offline Writer
Lynton

Location: Paris
Registered: 14 Oct 09

 Forum Profile
Posted: 11 Jan 11 19:26
Maine Coon eh QM so you ain't the boss in your own house!

Splendid cats and by far the craftiest - of course all cats have us humans taped but the Maine Coon - you deserve a medal QM. Is it a member of MENSA?

Bad news for Rabbits

Kraft release product 'I can't believe its not chicken'

Watching paint dry
Charpa93
This user is offline Writer
Charpa93

Registered: 17 Jul 09

 Forum Profile
 Writer's Profile
 Email
 Website
Posted: 11 Jan 11 19:32

Quote: queen mudder


Quote: Bureau
Cat: Overhears "We're bringing home a little Rottweiler puppy for puss to play with. Won't he be excited?"



Ha. If it was my Maine Coon, who's larger that the average Jack Russell/Corgi/Spaniel etc, he'd make mincemeat of a pup.


Mine too. His nickname is Fatso if that is any indication.
A neighbor boy came by during the holidays and I invited him into my home. One of my Maine Coons walked by (the largest one--Emerson) and the kid did a double take and then said "whoa, what is that?" I told him a cat and he almost ran out the door.

True story.

Charpa93
This user is offline Writer
Charpa93

Registered: 17 Jul 09

 Forum Profile
 Writer's Profile
 Email
 Website
Posted: 11 Jan 11 19:34

Quote: Lynton

Maine Coon eh QM so you ain't the boss in your own house!

Splendid cats and by far the craftiest - of course all cats have us humans taped but the Maine Coon - you deserve a medal QM. Is it a member of MENSA?

Bad news for Rabbits

Kraft release product 'I can't believe its not chicken'


Don't know about all Maine Coons, but mine are all from the same litter and I could not ask for more gentle cats. They are amazingly laid back and loving. Emerson, Graycie and Natascha (Tascia)

Sorry, you had to bring up cats.


 
Any opinions expressed here are purely the opinions of the contributors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Spoof, its staff or the original writer of the spoof news/parody/satire story.

Go to top

Forum permissions

You are not logged in.

  • You cannot create new topics in this forum
  • You cannot post new messages in this forum
  • You cannot add polls
  • You cannot link to external images in this forum
  • You cannot upload images in this forum
  • You cannot upload files in this forum

Who is online?

There are no registered users currently online.


Profile Featured Writer

Jeff Brone
Jeff Brone
Joined: 21 September 2007
Stories Written: 140
35 readers are online right now!

Go to top