Discussion Forum

Glenn Beck 'was joking about Muse complaint'

Der beloved Telegraf continues to nick all the best spoof headlines...

Spoof writers call strike after Telegraph, Michael O'Leary grab best spoof headlines

True, it's always good.

Barack Obama wins Nobel Peace Prize

No, he really just has. No, honest - I'm not joking. Really...

Silvio Berlusconi plans taskforce to fight bad press over sex and legal woes

Note: this from The Guardian, not TheSpoof.com

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"Their first job will be to monitor all the foreign press, including dailies, periodicals and TV in every latitude, from Japan to Peru," she told Corriere della Sera today.

The second task will be to "bombard those newsrooms with truthful and positive news", and reveal to the world "a generous, truthful and audacious Italy - the Italy of entrepreneurs, art, cultural events and our products".

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The lord chief justice of England and Wales is currently Lord Igor Judge, which is an apt name for the chief judge.

Sitting in the Court of Appeal, ruling on points of law in lesser courts, is Lord Justice (Sir John) Laws.

No oral sex, says ute crash waitress

From Northern Territory News (Australia)

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"I was not sucking his d*** - and it's pretty obvious that wasn't the case ... you only have to look at the mark on my chest," she said.

"Clearly I had my seatbelt on, so it's impossible that I'd be leaning over sucking his d*** unless he is hung like a donkey or I've got a f****** rubber neck.

"If it was true I'd just cop it sweet and think 'how embarrassing, I got caught sucking someone's d***' - but it is not true and that's what is p****** me off.

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http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/33343052/ns/world_news-europe/

Berlin brothel cuts rates for 'green' customers

Woman swallows 78 items of cutlery

Do you sometimes get the feeling that the translator hasn't fully immersed themselves in the culture of the language into which they're translating?

Or sometimes doesn't even have a grasp on the language itself?

Translated Cartoon Subtitles Gone Wrong

IMAGES of 66 suspects issued by cops after riots at the West Ham v Millwall match mistakenly featured actors from hooligan flick The Firm.

But because they turned off the sound they failed to realise the report featured footage from the movie.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2707700/Cops-issue-pics-of-footie-thugs-but-theyre-actually-stars-of-a-hooligan-movie.html

Bike sex case sparks legal debate

"The case of a man convicted of simulating sex with his bicycle has sparked a debate about human rights and the privacy of an individual."

...

"Stewart was put on the Sex Offenders' Register, which some posters said was an over-reaction by the sheriff."

Sex offender's register? Surely he should have been enrolled on a cycling proficiency course. No! You ride it like THIS!!

Thatcher's Dead

Well not really...

Another BBC article written as though it was appearing here on The Spoof!!

Jimbo

Loved the 'Translated Cartoon Subtitles'

Priceless.

Thanks for that mate!

Regards

Skoob.

Ditto for me Jimbo.

Laugh Out Loud fun.

Man with sexual fetish for slurry jailed

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David Truscott, 40, broke into a farm, covered himself in the waste and was seen masturbating, a court heard.

He was caught just weeks after he was released from a previous prison sentence for a similar offence.

Truscott was arrested in the early hours of November 9 when he was found by police sitting in manure at the same farm.

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Jimbo

Thanks for the link.

Another top story.

You really couldn't make stuff like that up, and if you did, people would say that you're sick in the head.

A few years ago in Hampshire, somebody was going around in the night sexually assaulting horses and then slashing them with a knife.

I mean...WTF?

Keep these things coming in. You and QM provide some interesting diversions with your real life stories in the forums. Very amusing.

Thanks.

Skoob.

I kid you not. Front page of the Torygraph right now:

Susan Boyle disturbs intruder

I'm not surprised. That woman simply is disturbing.

Here's the full monty:

Susan Boyle disturbs intruder in her house

An Atkins-style death greets the owner of the Segway company.

With accidents like this, who needs satirists?

Segway company owner dies riding two-wheeled machine off cliff

* Stifled, slightly guilty mirth *

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Quote: Skoob1999

Jimbo

Thanks for the link.

Another top story.

You really couldn't make stuff like that up, and if you did, people would say that you're sick in the head.

A few years ago in Hampshire, somebody was going around in the night sexually assaulting horses and then slashing them with a knife.

I mean...WTF?

Keep these things coming in. You and QM provide some interesting diversions with your real life stories in the forums. Very amusing.

Thanks.

Skoob.

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...why go to the tabloids when you can find it right on the Spoof described as
'satire':

"A deranged man broke into the New York City zoo and stabbed a female elephant named Mary in her vagina several times before being detained by security. He claimed he wanted to eat the elephant for Christmas dinner.

Zoo staff heard Mary screaming from the pain and when they got there they noticed the man inserting a large knife into the vagina of the female elephant. Every time she tried to turn around to attack him, he would run behind her continually stabbing into her vagina. If she ran he would run after her slashing into her vagina as blood poured out and she had no way to stop him. He was a determined man who was brave enough to tackle such a huge creature....'

Re: Quote from Morse about elephant:

That this story and others like it is allowed to remain on the Spoof gives me pause.

This is not normal yet it remains running for all to see. "Yes, they said, even the deranged have a voice on the Spoof, right before scores of readers were lost."

I honestly would like to know what gives. And if one more person claims that everyone has a right to write what they want, I'm gonna throw up my hands in despair.

In fact I may have already done that, I'm still trying to sort it out. I can't find it in me to contribute lately and wonder if this is the reason why.

It truly saddens me. But hey, that's just me.

What I am thankful for today...that I don't live anywhere near the person who wrote this story.

Charpa93

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Quote: Charpa93

Re: Quote from Morse about elephant:

That this story and others like it is allowed to remain on the Spoof gives me pause.

This is not normal yet it remains running for all to see. "Yes, they said, even the deranged have a voice on the Spoof, right before scores of readers were lost."

I honestly would like to know what gives. And if one more person claims that everyone has a right to write what they want, I'm gonna throw up my hands in despair.

In fact I may have already done that, I'm still trying to sort it out. I can't find it in me to contribute lately and wonder if this is the reason why.

It truly saddens me. But hey, that's just me.

What I am thankful for today...that I don't live anywhere near the person who wrote this story.

Charpa93

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...I didn't throw up my hands....but I did throw up...plenty more in this vein...
ditto on reluctant to wanting to direct 'friends' to enjoy the wonderful contributions from
the folks who really do contribute well written, articulate satire, thought provoking and enjoyable reads......

Kinda makes you wonder who you're sharing the site with..........
don't fancy being tarred with the same brush........

ReMorseful

This is getting very close to the current observations from QM on another forum thread. I really must agree.

In the UK, Chris Morris explored the boundaries of taste / humour with 'Brass Eye' and in doing so raised many deeply disturbing questions (most famously the 'Paedophile' special) about what can and cannot be discussed or 'spoofed'.
Of course it's subjective, but I guess it really does boil down to what is and is not funny or thought-provoking / questioning - and what the intent behind the piece is.

Salacious, usually appallingly written descriptions of women's / horses' / elephants' vaginas being stabbed seem to me to be the scribblings of either a seriously unhinged and possibly dangerous mind or the badly misjudged and puerile ramblings of someone with a sensahuma bypass. Either way, the intent* stinks.

*If, say, a writer were to write a 'humorous' piece about horrific practices such as female / male circumcision in order to lampoon and illuminate so-called 'ethnic, cultural and/or religious rites and customs' *shudder*, then there the intent is clear and, in my opinion, certainly justified.

IMVHO this sort of psychopathic dementia porn has no place on a site purporting to advance humour, wit and creative writing.

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Quote: pinxit

This is getting very close to the current observations from QM on another forum thread. I really must agree.

In the UK, Chris Morris explored the boundaries of taste / humour with 'Brass Eye' and in doing so raised many deeply disturbing questions (most famously the 'Paedophile' special) about what can and cannot be discussed or 'spoofed'.
Of course it's subjective, but I guess it really does boil down to what is and is not funny or thought-provoking and what the intent behind the piece is.

Salacious, usually appallingly written descriptions of women's / horses' / elephants' vaginas being stabbed seem to me to be the scribblings of either a seriously unhinged and possibly dangerous mind or the badly misjudged and puerile ramblings of someone with a sensahuma bypass. Either way, the intent stinks.

IMVHO this sort of psychopathic dementia porn has no place on a site purporting to advance humour, wit and creative writing.

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Pin:

Same writer...same thigh slapping reads....

anybody missing their pet cats or gerbils?

Better check the microwave.....

Morse

Hi Morse,

Sorry, just updated to (cack-handedly) qualify what I meant by 'intent'.

pin