Blarney - (ReUterus): Irish parody site bloger Fergus McShergar is being sought by cops today after 'literally hundreds' of wax figurines vanished into thin air from the National Wax Museum near Blarney, County Louse.
Police sources said today McShergar is wanted along with a huge gang of desperate ravers who burst into the museum after midnight last night and made off with models of the Teletubbies, Bob the Builder, Australian painter Rolf Harris, Hannibal Lecter and Dolly the Sheep.
"These are desperados," a police source told TV news reporter today after denying that cops had found out any motives behind the apparent thefts.
Museum aides complained that military uniforms were also stripped from figures of the Irish 1916 Easter Rising and revolutionary leader Michael Collins, "as well as models of Adolf Hitler and Josef Stalin".
"This has all the hallmarks of McShergar and his mysterious coterie of moonshine distillers," sources complained.
Many of the missing attractions included characters from the Children's World of Fairytale and Fantasy, the Stormont Chamber of Horrors "and models of Irish hysterical figures such as writers James Joyce and WB Yeats, Robert Emmet and leaders of the 1916 rebellion".
The Museum has issued a plea for the return of the memorabilia especially the military uniform "which are desperately needed for the ceremonial opening of the Northern Irish Ass-embly in October".
Fergus McShergar is 69.
