An explosion rocked a California resort hotel last night where hundreds of conservative activists were meeting. As hotel personnel and hotel guests rushed to a room on the fifteenth floor, Michael Steel, Chairman of the RNC cried out as he threw open the door to the room, "Fire in the hole!"
Ann Coulter, fire brand conservative activist and talk radio regular, staggered from the room, dazed but not seriously hurt.
As investigators tried to piece the facts together, it turns out that Ms. Coulter thought she was ordering a IUD (intrauterine device )from a company in China, but as it turns out the company is a munitions manufacturer and what she received was a IED (improvised explosive device).
As the instructions were in Chinese, Ms. Coulter just assumed she was using it properly. Evidentially she did not realize otherwise (even though the device seemed somewhat outsized) until after the explosion occurred. The only words she uttered, over and over again in a low whisper were, "Finally, Mr. Right."
Ms. Coulter attended the mornings meetings apparently unfazed and gave her scheduled talk, "Hail to the Chief: Liberals, Commies, Socialists,and Sexual Perverts: The Dirty Underbelly of America."
In related news, a munitions manufacturer in Shanxi Province, China, is reporting receiving a standing order for twelve of the devices a month from an unknown resident of the US, known to them only as AC/DC. The orders are being shipped through a munitions dealer in Tehran. Ms. Coulter has declined comment.