Guess who paid $16 million for an antique chastity belt!

Funny story written by PP Rega

Friday, 3 April 2009

image for Guess who paid $16 million for an antique chastity belt!
Sophia de Medici

A Renaissance chastity belt went on the auction block at Sotheby's in New York City last night and the winning bid was $16,500,000. This has set a new record for antique chastity belts.

The contraption, made of bronze with gold inlay and encrusted with diamonds and rubies, is also lined with prickly silver filigree at its specific hygienic apertures. It was created for the Florentine Medici family in the late-15th century, purportedly by Leonardo Da Vinci somewhere in-between his Last Supper and the Mona Lisa.

According to chastity experts, Leonardo designed the belt under a commission established by Guido de Medici, Lorenzo Il Magnifico's cousin, who was trying to preserve his wife's purity and his honor while he went off on one his endless campaigns. His wife, Sophia, according to historians, was one of the most beautiful women in Europe.

One contemporaneous account by the Franciscan monk, Guido Sarducci, described her as "Una bella ragazzina con occhi splendidi, mammelle meravigliose ed un culo bellissimo!"

The winner of the chastity belt was a certain B. Madoff, Sing Sing Penitentiary.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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