Los Angeles, California - Hot off his latest arrogant disregard for Hispanic WWII veterans in excluding them from his documentary "The War" before Hispanic groups spoke out and demanded that he include their contribution to the war, Ken Burns announced today that he will take on something more topical and less controversial like the Jena Six issue. He has already sent out several producers and camera crews to Jena, Louisiana for interviews.
Dailies from the latest Burns documentary, however, have already drawn criticism from the rope manufacturing industry, White supremacist groups, and the Arbor Society, all who claim that they have been excluded from the new documentary.
"The story is not about nooses, racist people or 'White shade' trees," explained Ken Burns. "It's about some freshman kid that wandered into Senior Court. As my documentary will prove, the whole thing is much to do about nothing. Nothing more than a schoolyard squabble. It will all blow over in a couple weeks, three tops."
Burns denies any hanging nooses from the 'White Shade' tree to terrorize the local Black population as well.
"They were simply ropes placed in the breaches of the 'White Shade' tree to hang up Piñatas in preparation of a Mexican Independent Day celebration by the predominately White student body's Spanish club," said Burns.
Burns then admitted that he based his documentary entirely on still photographs of angry marching Black people instead of actual interviews with them, saying that not one reached out and bothered contacting him.
Ken Burns explained he specializes in digging up Civil War photographs that are over 200-years-old, and then filming them with scripted narrative celebrity voiceovers.
"I'm just not that good in dealing with living breathing human beings that have a mind of their own and articulate their side of the story without my scripted assistance, particularly when I believe they don't exist," said Burns.