Necrophiliac Divorcee Has Really Tough Time WIth Kill, F*ck, Marry Game

Funny story written by ComedyDot

Monday, 22 June 2015

Neil Ortiz had just gotten through a very painful divorce, and was just trying to get back out there. He attended a fun mixer to try and meet some new (preferably terminal) bachelorettes, when the party game 'Kill, F*ck, Marry' Game broke out. He was trying his best to go with the flow, but he stumbled right from the start.

"Okay, okay - here's one for you Neil!" chirped a bubbly Amy Phelps. "Jennifer Aniston, Angelina Jolie & Scarlet Johasson."

Neil giggled with glee! "That's easy! I'd 'Kill' them all then 'F*ck' them!"

Amy repied, "Wait, what? You have to choose one to kill, one to f*ck, and one to marry.'

Neil blushed. "Oh, of course," he sheepishly continued. "Well, I'd like to kill Angelina…"

The gang waited.

"And…then f*ck Angelina, and I guess then, I could marry her, but I'm really not ready to jump into anything right now."

"Okay, thanks Neil," the group replied in disgust. The game broke, and it was clear Neil wasn't exactly the life of the party. 'Well, good!' thought Neil, 'I hate life at parties, anyway!'

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics



Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Subscribe…
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot