Bristol - (Bristol Ram-Bam-Thankyee-Ma'am)): Last month's forensic trawl of Canynge Road rubbish has apparently unearthed some spent DIY pregnancy testing kits.
A post-funeral headline drought saw weekend red tops seize on the items as tragic Jo Yeates was finally being laid to rest.
Pathology reports on her body have made no mention of any gestation, thus begging a question obvious to some:
"Which woman at Number 44 tested positive to being pregnant?" Daily Smearer phone-hacking correspondent Johnny Lark asked today.
"Are we talking about a secret accomplice, terrified of admitting about being up the duff?"
"The smart money's on Tanja Morson," Bristol Ram barman Dave Skank opined sagely.
"Nobody here's seen her in ages - but whaddahell!
"She's bound to be looking pale and queasy with that Dutch boyfriend banged up on remand at HMP Belmarsh".
Tomorrow's Sunday Smearer readers' poll is bound to establish the likely culprit.
