Geoffrey Simmons, 34, was today stripped of his title for "Most gruntled man in the UK". Simmons is said to have lost the title after finding himself on the end of a "right royal roasting" from his wife, which happened just three days before the de-throning.
"I'm gutted," Simmons confessed. "I've been perfectly gruntled for the last 29 years - something of a world record. The title which was bestowed on me by the 'Gruntle Association of Britain', has now been rescinded...after thirteen years."
Simmons sobbed uncontrollably for a few minutes before the interview could resume.
"Anyway, my wife is very sorry for what she did to me, and I'm reasonably gruntled again. I'll never be the same man, though."
Sister society, the "Dis-gruntled Association of Britain" has since refused to offer membership to Mr Simmons for his recent behaviour, but apparently did accept his wife.
