Written by queen mudder

Saturday, 5 December 2009

image for Lawyers take on 'suicided' WMD doc fantasy
Kelly predicted he would be foud one day 'dead by the Bushes'

London - (Gotcha!): "Not as bleedin obvious as finding 'God's Banker' Roberto Calvi hanging under Blackfriars Bridge, of course," a Serious Fraud Orifice source said today.

"But stumbling on Dr David Kelly's 'suicided' body on Harrowdown Hill must rank among conspiracy buffs' 10 all-time greats!"

The statement follows an announcement that a famous London human frights law firm is to reopen the Blair government-gagged inquest into the WMD expert's sudden unexpected death.

The lawyers will enter the affray fresh from nailing a WMD fantasy peddling oil trader for a record $50 million damages in the Ivory Coast poisoning class action.

They have been hired by a group of Royal Freak Hospital doctors to put a firework up the Hutton Inquiry's backside over Dr David Kelly's 2003 'suicide'.

The scientist famously predicted his own death 'in the woods/bushes' after telling the BBC that Blair's Iraq War dossier was a load of sexed up bollox.

Forensic analysis claimed a slit wrist and four paracetamol probably killed the doc.

But the Blair government quickly barred all attempts at a legal inquest and instead put up daftass Lord Hutton to cover over the traces.

A spokesman for Barnoness Snotland, UK attorney general, said an application has been submitted for an immediate exhumation of the body. And a subpoena awaits to make Tony Blair testify under oath about the whole sordid business.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Dr David Kelly

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