Ronnie Wood dumps Russian slag

Funny story written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 16 September 2009


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Midnight slanging match or drug-crazed pillowtalk?

London - (Sticky Fingers): "We suspect he's shagging that hermaphrodite floozy," pals of sexagenarian Rolling Stones guitarist Ronnie Wood said today, "whotsisname, Caster Semen-ya."

Neighbors in top Hampstead eurotrash enclave Redington Road also reckon Wood, 69, has dumped his Russian girlfriend Svetlana 'Hotlips' Smirnoff.

An all-night slanging match about Viagra-Harvey Wallbanger abuse ended with Wood, 69, calling Miss S a sex-crazed nympho vampire slag ("yeah, but that was just the pillow-talk").

Twenty year-old Miss Smirnoff met Rolling Stone Wood last year at a rehab clinic and shacked up with him pretty damned quick.

Mrs Wood has the patience of a saint and a shit-hot divorce lawyer promising her fifty mill.


The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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