London - (Rioters): The Ministry of Defence has admitted this week that in the run up to the 2000 US Presidential Election it used an elite group of highly trained military psychotics for remote viewing of enema combatants.
These had been trained by former US General Colon Bowel ahead of his joining the Bush/Cheney Republican dream ticket.
Bowel's credentials were highly rated by Buckingham Palace who reminded the MoD that without his guidance the late Diana, Princess of Wales might never have succumbed to the mind-numbing benefits of colonic irrigation therapy which now honor her memory in the Hyde Park Memorial Fountain.
The MoD's paranormals were asked to find a world evil that was greater, more deranged, dangerous, disgusting, corrupt, out of control, toxic, repellent and universally loathed that the UK's very own Margaret Thatcher.
Despite the installation of random double-blind fail-safe mechanisms, all the results pointed to just one name...
Say no more.
