Midlands Couple Off To Skegness In July

Written by Monkey Woods

Friday, 3 May 2019

image for Midlands Couple Off To Skegness In July
Skegness (12,000BC)

Tongues were wagging in the East Midlands this morning, as it started to become common knowledge that a couple from Leicester had announced to friends in the pub last night, that they would be going to Skegness for a week in July.

Tom and Betty Bromide, both 48, said they hadn't been away for three years, and thought it was about high time that they did. They considered going over to Blackpool, but everyone goes there, and it would probably be packed-out. In any case, they might not have got a room, having left it late like this.

The Bromides will be staying in a caravan on a site just outside Skeggy, on the road to Ingoldmells, and will be within easy reach of all of the local amenities, such as fish and chip shops, amusements, tacky gift shops, and somewhere to buy toilet roll and a newspaper. There's also a nearby Car Boot Sale on Sundays.

Betty said:

"I said to Tom, I said, we should go to Lloret like our Linda did, but he wouldn't hear of it. He doesn't like Spanish food - it gives him the runs."

Tom agreed:

"She said to me, she said, we should go to Lloret like her Linda did, but I wouldn't hear of it. I don't like Spanish food - it gives me the runs."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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