Good Boring Britain

Funny story written by Backandtotheleft

Wednesday, 30 April 2014

ITV's new flagship breakfast show "Good Morning Britain" rolled out yesterday and, as with anything, it proved to be a bitter disappointment. The show, spearheaded by Susanna Reid, promised to revolutionise breakfast TV but only really resulted in looking like a cheap knock off of every regional American breakfast newscast.

The show was slated by critics who claimed that the presenters lacked "charisma" and that one of them may in fact have been a cardboard cut out. Admittedly Back and to the Left news was just impressed that people could be up and at work at that time of the day. One online critic wrote:

"Unbelievable that ITV can poach the best legs in breakfast TV and stick them behind a desk."

Another along the same vein went:

"Hiding Susanna's leg's is unforgivable."

And a third chipped in with:

"If I can't see her legs I'll have to stick to Red Tube in the mornings. It's a disgrace. ITV have fuelled my porn addiction."

It seemed that all the criticism from the viewers was nothing to do
with neither the content nor the format of the show but of the fact you couldn't see some newsreaders legs. In our experience what actually comes out of a newsreaders mouth is a lot more important that what you can fantasise about putting in there.

It seems to us the only way that the show will continue is to put Susanna in her underwear and write the stories on her body luminous paint. But wouldn't that cheapen the role of women in TV broadcasting? A lot people would say they didn't care as long as it's not Clair Balding.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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