Written by IainB

Monday, 14 June 2010

image for Derek Acorah to replace Ledley King

With the injury news blow that Ledley King's groin strain will keep him out of action for three weeks, Fabio Capello has appealed to FIFA to bring in another defender.

The international footballing body has sensationally agreed and Capello has put in a call to ex-Liverpool and Wrexham player, Derek Acorah.

It is something of a controversial choice, given that Acorah is now in his sixties, and has not played football since he was twenty-one, and only peripherally played for Liverpool. However, Capello is under the belief that Acorah can still do a job for the England squad.

"I may not be picking Derek," said Capello in an interview this morning, "As with Beckham, I am bringing him in for his other attributes. If I think he can do a job on the pitch though I will pick him."

It is expected that Acorah will be involved in team selection and tactics, after consultation with the spirit of Alf Ramsay, who was the last English manager to win anything. In addition, if he does get a game, it is expected that what he lacks in pace, he makes up in his ability to foresee the future and know exactly where the opposition will be and what they will do. With his ability to make people believe the unbelievable, he will also be responsible for the psychological belittling of the opposition in the tunnel ahead of the match.

Acorah is said to be thrilled.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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