Paralympics Swimming Death Shock

Funny story written by Montague Montgomery

Tuesday, 30 September 2008

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Not quite a Llama. Certainly not a Dalai.

Today Paralympics chiefs have admitted that the Tibeten freestyle wheelchair swimming event turned into a disaster ending in the death of all seven disabled athletes.

Unfortunately, due to no-one being able to hear the starter gun underwater, the competitors thought there had been a delay. Jing Yang Yong, the event co-ordinator, then 'forgot' about the race and issued instructions for others to take place above it.

Consequently, at the end of the day, when pool cleaners changed the water, there was uproar when rusted wheelchairs with the drowned athletes attached were found.

As the games had gone so well, Chinese officials declared an 'official' cover-up. This story was only revealed later when medals were found left ready for collection by the winners of the event.

Jou Yang Yong - no relation to the event co-ordinator - was discovered placing them on rubbish tip that was later found to be a shanty village of 100 residents moved to make way for the Olympics.

Fou Yang Yong - no relation to anyone apart from his family - smuggled the medals out to Tibet where relatives were waiting for the return of their sporting heroes.

His holiness the Dalai Llama declined to comment, instead issuing a statement that he was not a sheep or a camel.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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