UK Biscuit Shortage Due To Storms Desmond and Eva Disabling McVitie's Carlisle Factory
'We've had a lot of other problems due to the storms,' said a fan of custard creams, bourbons and ginger nuts, 'but this one takes the biscuit!'
written by Swan Morrison, 06 March 2016
EU Campaign Could Damage Public Image Of Boris Johnson
'If Mr Johnson keeps expressing firm opinions,' warned a leading style guru, 'people will cease to view him as a loveable, bumbling eccentric, but think of him as just another irritating politician.'
written by Swan Morrison, 06 March 2016
Driverless Lorries To Be Trialled In The UK Announces Department Of Transport
'The software,' said a spokesman, 'can now speed recklessly six inches from the vehicle in front; block the middle lane by overtaking at a snail's pace, and flash and honk to harass other road users.'
written by Swan Morrison, 06 March 2016
