Amendment to The Patriot Act
WASHINGTON: An amendment to The Patriot Act 2001 has been rushed through Congress. Any Jew criticizing Israel will henceforth be guilty of antisemitism and possible treason.
written by Auntie Matter, 14 April 2016
LA STD Clinic Copying Bernie Sanders.
A STD clinic in LA is copying Bernie Sanders campaign slogan to advertise its services. "Feel the burn? Freestdtest.org." Makes sense because just like STDs, Bernie's campaign is popular on campuses.
written by Heeke, 14 April 2016
Jeb Bush Motivational Speaker
Jeb is going back to giving speeches after his attempt for the Republican nomination. He is a very talented motivational speaker, because after you listen to his story, you feel great about yourself.
written by Heeke, 14 April 2016
Supreme Court Vote on Banning This Male Enhancer
The SCOTUS today voted to ban Bill Clinton's Miracle Male Enhancer because it only works when around the subject is near blue dresses and fails when the male's spouse is around.
written by Heeke, 14 April 2016
House Speaker Paul Ryan Quits
Ryan issued a statement ruling himself out as a replacement candidate at a contested convention. Things are bad in the Republican Party when people who aren't even running are dropping out of the race
written by Heeke, 14 April 2016
Kasich Speaks in NY
John Kasich gave a 30-minute speech in New York City. Afterwards, the crowd applauded Kasich and then put $8.34 in his hat.
written by Heeke, 14 April 2016
Bill Clinton In The Bronx
Bill Clinton was in the Bronx campaigning for Hillary yesterday, and visited the "Hebrew Home for the Aging." While Hillary actually went there to drop off Bernie Sanders.
written by Heeke, 14 April 2016
