Peruvian Tribe "Untouched by Civilization"
A campaign has been launched to allow the recently discovered Peruvian tribe "untouched by civilization" to REMAIN UNTOUCHED BY CIVILIZATION as all of us 'touched' by 'civilization' are FUCKED UP.
written by Auntie Matter, 24 July 2015
Elon Musk Buys Space Station
High tech industrialist and SpaceXXX CEO Elon Musk paid an unprecedented $47,000,000,000.00 to purchase the International Space Station and convert it into the very first interstellar whorehouse.
written by Dick Sheerer, 24 July 2015
Big Apple - Rotten To The Core
At the behest of Rudi Juliani NY Gov. Cuomo ordered the National Guard to cordon off Manhattan and quarantine the island to keep the insanity epidemic inside the Big Asshole - oops, I meant Big Apple.
written by Dick Sheerer, 24 July 2015
Kill Shot From Sun Hits Earth
A spectacular solar mass ejection hurled astronomical waves of thermonuclear radiation through space directly toward Earth and burned the planet into a charred cinder ball in just a matter of seconds.
written by Dick Sheerer, 24 July 2015
New Supreme Court Ruling
In a landmark decision to settle the frivolous lawsuit of Spoof v Goof the high court ruled in favor of the defense and Justice Anton Scalia pounded the plaintiff's head into the floor with his gavel.
written by Dick Sheerer, 24 July 2015
Fiorina Takes Over Microsoft
Carly Fiorina dropped her political plans to take the reigns of Microsoft Corporation. Her first step as CEO will be to fire everyone, sell all the stocks, and embezzle billions to buy the presidency.
written by Dick Sheerer, 24 July 2015
Greece Returns To Power
After hitting bottom they had nowhere else to go but up so Greek officials scaled the cliffs to the summit of Mount Olympus where they convened to beseech the gods to exact vengeance on Angela Merkle.
written by Dick Sheerer, 24 July 2015
Ted Cruz Heats Up Fossil Fuel Debate
At the end of a 3-day filibuster against new oil industry regulations, Sen. Ted Cruz made a final point by dousing himself with gasoline and catching fire, shrieking in pain while he burned to death.
written by Dick Sheerer, 24 July 2015
McConnell's Serves New Unhappy Meal
A disgruntled employee at a McConnell's restaurant stabbed his boss to death and put the dismembered body parts through a meat grinder, then cooked and served it with a milk shake and a side of fries.
written by Dick Sheerer, 24 July 2015
