HSBC pleads 'shame' over Swiss tax scams
Blames Brits' Queen Elizardbirth for putting them up to it in the first place
written by queen mudder, 23 February 2015
Husband claims wife is holding him 'prisoner' in their Hamptons teardown
Wife says he's locked himself in a makeshift crack den with Mexican gardener and his twin brother
written by queen mudder, 23 February 2015
Hustler Club exotic dancers 'being stripped' of minimum wage
Everyone knows downtown rates are fifty bucks for ten minutes - same as a handjob in Hells Kitchen
written by queen mudder, 23 February 2015
Ronald Reagan's 'fake' friend wants 'fraud' plea deal
Says The Gipper was every inch the professional con artist and would have been proud of this latest twist
written by queen mudder, 23 February 2015
Landlord sues councilwoman for having him arrested over 'rented beef'
Says nothing criminal with leased-back rib-eye!
written by queen mudder, 23 February 2015
NY-bound jet forced to make emergency landing with crappy sunscreen
Correction! Uh, 'cracked windscreen' maybe better?
written by queen mudder, 23 February 2015
Al Sharpton paid to keep his mouth shut about lack of black TV programming suit
Always having to wear a lime green tuxedo or pale grey pinstripe three-piece suit kinda harsh on the guy I reckon
written by queen mudder, 23 February 2015
Hand-mixer News: ISIS' English-language schools teaching jihadi children how to blend
More dumb recipies from The Taleban Cookbook
written by queen mudder, 23 February 2015
John Travolta Shows Off Scientology Face-Touching Super Powers At 2015 Oscars
John Travolta, who at last year's Oscars showed that Scientology super-powers didn't extend to name pronunciation, DID reveal his face touching power, which causes instant revulsion to the victim.
written by Al N., 23 February 2015
Burnt to a crisp like Jordan!
Sunbed after sunbed, beach after beach, white turning brown and red attempting to look like Jordan! Is it worth it? Ask your oncologist!
written by unknown
Thief Lectures Court
Thief Malcolm Riffkid told a Court in Barnsley today that if he was paid more he wouldn't have to steal.
written by j.w., 23 February 2015
Balls tears a new a**hole
Ed Balls really tore George Osborne a new one today in parliament, over HSBC. Balls jiggled around before giving Mr Osborne everything he had. George was covered in embarrassment by home time.
written by antoine, 23 February 2015
BBC apologises for spate of self blinding among pubescent boys
After an expose of a trial NHS programme where blind people feel for growths in breast tissue, the BBC apologised to the many families whose sons blinded themselves in order to get on 'feeler teams'.
written by antoine, 23 February 2015
Oscars are rubbish
2015 Oscars - 'Full of crap' says BBC's Mark Cammode, ironically.
written by antoine, 23 February 2015
Putin admits failings
Vladimir Putin has admitted he's jealous;of Naomi Campbell.
"Her lips are to die for, while mines are like Kermit the frog - I have none. But I will have those lips.. believe me...muwahaaha. I will."
written by antoine, 23 February 2015
Cash for access denial
A press release issued from head office of the company -"Rifkind&Straw Cash for Access Ltd" owned by two former government ministers has denied all knowledge of so-called cash for access allegations.
written by antoine, 23 February 2015
