'Final Member' Documentary Examines World's First Penis Museum.
Women and young ladies expected to attend, their curiosity being pricked.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
IBM: Too late to stop 24/7 monitoring of public.
Oh if President wants it to stop, it will stop!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
USA now pumping 10% of world's crude oil.
So why are the gas prices still going up?
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
STUDY: 'Small' Nuclear War Would Destroy World.#2
I think the terms "Small nuclear war" are an oxymoron. There is no such thing.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Anti-Anxiety Drugs Tied to Higher Mortality
Headlines like this make more people anxious so stop it right now!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Investigation Commissioned By Chris Christie Clears Chris Christie In "Bridgegate"
New Jersey: Internal Investigation Funded By Taxpayers Exonerates Christie Of Wrongdoing--
No One With Pulse Surprised
written by Angelo Thomas, 27 March 2014
Francis concerned for 'religious freedom' in USA
Many Americans are concerned also. Like a photographer forced to take pics at gay wedding against his religion.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
STUDY: 'Small' Nuclear War Would Destroy World.
No crops would grow without sunshine for years if nuke clouds kept earth in shadow.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Ukraine says 100,000 Russian troops near border.
Easy target for anyone to hit. If there is any al-Qaeda or Taliban out there? Probably get 2000 virgins.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
GOP: Economic Growth 'Half of What President Said His Policies Would Deliver'.
Hillary: I tried to tell everyone six years ago!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Hospitals Plot the End of Insurance Companies.
We may just list different procedures and price. Easy for us, easier for patient to choose doctor, hospital.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Condi Rice Blasts President's Weakness
Jimmy Carter looks like Mel Gibson compared to this!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Rand Paul announces 50-state network, taps 200 people for team.
Looks like he's going to run for President or something, according to CNN experts.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
......strewth, the truth is out there!!
Apparently Scientists have recreated Mars in Herefordshire at a cost of £1.2bn.........surely it would have been cheaper to go to Norfolk if looking for aliens?
written by Herrdoktorfox, 27 March 2014
True Facts from Snoops #1098
Snoops: It's been confirmed shortly after his death that "Smokey the Bear's" middle name was 'the'.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
True Facts from Snoops #1097
As Lincoln did no wear a stove top hat but a section of actual stove pipe on his head, it made him look a little darker in old photographs.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1096
Snoops: After making it legal to have alcohol again, President FDR led the crowd at the White House with "Yo Ho Ho & A Bottle of Rum!"
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Excerpts From Sarah's Speeches #12
"...although the President named Clinton had clearly been prove to wiggling his feelers..he had refused to ricin!"
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Excerpts From Sarah's Speeches #11
"...Martin Luther King the II stood on this precipice and gave his Famous Amos Speech: "Lately we have all been going through a bad patch!"
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Excerpts From Sarah's Speeches #11
"...I think they called it the Boxer Rebellion because no one had any guns..."
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Excerpts From Sarah's Speeches #10
"..during the War of Independence, the Germans, as you well know, were hired by the Brits as missionaries who burned down Paul Revere and the old North Church!"
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
The sentence "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog." uses every letter in the alphabet.
But in all recorded history, no one has ever saw it happen.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Police Raid Illegal Pot Smokers
People were in a Think Tank & people could see smoke coming out. Someone called the Fire dept. Then the guys started to roll out the door laughing about the fact they can't understand their own notes.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
Husbands after sex, two minutes and thirty five seconds.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
A surgeon in louisville holds the record as he squirted 34.3 feet and gave half his award to the victim's family.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Cow News
It's possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs. The reason? It was so scared on the way up it unloaded and now its afraid it might slip and fall.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Schwarzenegger To Play Ageing Terminator
........thus reprising that classic line..."Ow! My back!"
written by Herrdoktorfox, 27 March 2014
The number of possible ways of playing the first four moves per side in a game of chess is 318,979,564,000.
That's why you have to tap the old guys in the park playing chess. They could have died six hours ago.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
According to a Think Tank in Boston:
Cat's urine glows under a black light. If you don't believe this, just try it. It took the Think Tank guys six months but they are absolutely sure!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Today in History #8
Lincoln, Sherman and Grant meet, 1865. Everything goes well until Sherman burns down the tent.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Today in History #7
Toyota founder dies, 1952, after the gas pedal stuck as he went through a tree at 110 MPH.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Today in History #6
In 1998, the Food and Drug Administration approved the drug Viagra and immediately ran out the door, one day after it was invented.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Today in History #5
In 1958, Nikita Khrushchev became Soviet premier in addition to First Secretary of the Communist Party. He immediately pulled off his shirt and made people like Putin to shame.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Today in History #4
In 1933, Japan officially withdrew from the League of Nations. Next, it was Wonder Woman, followed closely by the original Flash!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Today in History #3
In 1884, the first telephone line between Boston and New York was inaugurated. At first, they had to use a lard can, but within 3 months, only a small can.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Today in History #2
In 1625, Charles I acceded to the English throne upon the death of James I. Many couldn't believe that Charles was so anxious, that he sat on James I before they could get the body off the throne.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Today in History
In 1513, Spanish explorer Juanter Ponds de Leon sighted the present-day Florida Gulf.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1095
Snoops: Although The Flash was extremely fast, he never could catch up to patting his own tail.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1094
Snoops: Eli Whitney was almost hanged 5 times, until everyone learned that a Cotton Gin was not an alcoholic drink. By that time 17 people had died from choking on cotton.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1093
Snoops: The smallest number of eggs you can leave in a cartoon? One.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1092
Snoops: After final totals, this past year's Super Bowl audience came in below the SpongeBob SquarePants Marathon!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1091
Snoops: When Ed Sullivan had The Rolling Stones on his show, he would only allow Keith Richards to be shown from the neck down!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1090
Snoops: It's been confirmed. Two of George Straits Exes now live in Ohio and one in Alabama!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1089
Snoops: A new theory of why the dinosaurs all died out is that their leader was a Jim Jones type. Thanks to the Think Tank, this could just be it!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1089
Snoops: Because of an unusually rough winter, many home school students will have to make it up by extending school year!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
New 'Star Wars' Plot Revealed?
It has to do with something called "The Dark Side".
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
VIDEO: College Students Fail to Name a Single U.S. Senator.
High schoolers fail to name a single former President!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Up to 10,000 Marijuana Convictions Could Be Overturned in Colorado.
Moonshiners in Kentucky, Tennessee and West Virginia object!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Border Patrol releasing illegal immigrants into south Texas.
Then why do we need a Border Control? What are they controlling?
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
For Dems, politicians in handcuff point to image problems.
I can see that. Yes, that could be a problem. Let's just hope none of the others are caught until after election.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
CA state senator accused of wiring frog!
Sorry. That should read: CA state senator accused of wire fraud!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
NY assemblyman's office raided by FBI.
Following up from CIA investigation yesterday. Assemblyman demands to watch so they don't plant anything.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
SPRING BREAK: Shark gives Florida student two-hour ride.
Water skiing squirrel wants to go next!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Alabama congressional candidate shoots up Obamacare bill.#2
"Great Jumpin' Horny Toads! That's one puzzling bit of poopoo!" "He's worse than that honery rabbit!"
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Alabama congressional candidate shoots up Obamacare bill.
"And yes, I do have a license to carry a weapon."
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Bat Eating Ban, Warning on Rats.
World docs warn not to eat either of these as you could get Eboli Virus. Ozzy Osbourne showing concerns. "Too late for me I guess!"
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
OBAMA: 'The Government Should Not Collect or Hold This Data in Bulk'.
"We just take a quick look to see if we have anything on political opponents."
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Pope Francis Thanks Predecessors
Overheard: Not knowing he was being recorded at the time, the popular Pope Francis blurted out a 'thank you' to Popes from the past: "Those reactionary pr*cks made my new job so much easier..."
written by Angelo Thomas, 27 March 2014
Piers Morgan Sympathetic
Report: CNN pundit Piers Morgan says he now fully appreciates the political term "lame duck".
written by Angelo Thomas, 27 March 2014
Anderson Cooper Admits He Likes Cher and Kathy Griffin Fighting Over Him
He says that it makes him feel dainty.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 27 March 2014
Mitt Romney's Big Secret
Old Mittens has admitted that he truly feels in his heart that he could have won the election if only he wasn't so damn rich.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 27 March 2014
David Letterman's Same Sex Concern
David Letterman is concerned about himself because lately he says he has been having sexual fantasies about Jimmy Kimmel.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 27 March 2014
Gary Busey Says He's Building A Drone
Gary said he got the directions from Paris Hilton (Oops!).
written by Abel Rodriguez, 27 March 2014
Alec Baldwin Says He's Saying Goodbye To The USA
He stated that he's fed up with the American Paparazzi always asking him if he's bipolar, or an atheist, or gay.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 27 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1088
Snoops: The only electric device a Mennonite is permitted to use is a dentist drill. Augers have driven away hundreds.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Today in History
In 1989, a clown by the name of "Lonzo" became the first person ever to die from exploding cigar lung cancer!
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Look ma', no hands
A man died after trying to dry his hands using a windmill. He bought a crane, ascended to the blades, held his hands out and they were chopped off. It's the first windmill related death in history.
written by Matt Brown, 27 March 2014
Putin & Merkel-- Shocking New 'Snowden Leak'
Initially acquired by the NSA, The Guardian has published a raunchy 2013 transcript of "Sexting" messages between German Chancellor Angela Merkel and Russian President Vladimir Putin.
written by Angelo Thomas, 27 March 2014
Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.
The last 15-30 so at a nursing home. So most aren't even trying to help the odds.
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
Ten percent of the Russian government's income comes from the sale of vodka.
"As long as we keep them feeling good they're happy enough being poor."
written by Bureau, 27 March 2014
