Paula Dean Treats Martha Stewart To Some Down-Home Southern Cooking
Dean, on the rebound from her bout with slippery lip speak, entertained ex-con and style maven Stewart. Tasting Paula's signature dish of deep-fried squirrel fritters, Martha opined:"Needs more lard!"
written by Trinculoman, 23 March 2014
European Royalty Bestow New Title on Obama
Brussels-In an unprecedented joint proclamation the royal houses of Europe have created and bestowed a new title on President Obama. Henceforth he shall be referred to as "His Most Exalted Wimpyness."
written by Trinculoman, 23 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops: #1054
Snoops: Sigman Fraud was a great thinker. He thought about sex day and night.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Man arrested after asking bank teller to spank him
"I was very embarrassed by my co-workers. He knew that he was to wait until I got off work."
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi Bright As Sarah Palin
After a huge blunder earlier by Sarah Palin, Nancy Pelosi spoke at today's meeting about all the oil we're purchasing from Sandy Arabia! Like Palin, we're in good hands. Meanwhile Putin's on the Ritz!
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops: #1053
Snoops: At last count, there have been some 1500 stunt men used in James Bond movies, but only three deaths!
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops: 1052
There was only one DC Comics "Spontaneous Combustion Girl" comic. Must say that no one could come up with a plot once she exploded.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops: 1051
Snoops: Literally hundreds of people have broken off a tooth from eating the Waldorf Hotel Salad. Most blame the ground up bricks.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1050
Snoops: Leading up to World War One, the Cancer of Germany took advantage of the Arch Duck Franz Ferdinand of Austria who was resuscitated but was then shot through the head with a deadbolt!
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
NATO commander warns of Russian threat to separatist Moldova region
Is Russia trying to bring back the old Soviet Union?
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Jimmy Carter believes U.S. is spying on him
"You can't blame them. I'm a dangerous man. Just ask Mama or Billy? Dead? Then ask a dead spy!"
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
..."Gobble Gobble Gotcha!
Turkey shoots down Syrian military jet...foul play suspected.
written by Herrdoktorfox, 23 March 2014
Ignoramuses Writing Spoofs on the Rise
Crimea is NOT an independent nation, and believe it or not Northern Ireland is ALSO part of the United Kingdom, but hey who cares about getting your facts right when you're just so freakin hilarious!
written by Talking Tic-Tacs, 23 March 2014
No Hope For America?
Sarah Palin told the audience today at a special rally about Hillary's lie about her being shot at in Bosnia. "That's like me telling you that I was named for the Sarah Desert in Australia!"
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Cemeteries 'go green' with burials.
Ask to be buried face down with acorn up their wazzoo!
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Germany seizes cocaine-filled condoms sent to Vatican
Pope Francis says that it was all a frame up.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Barack 'Has Dragged Me Kicking and Screaming Into Things that I Wanted No Parts Of'.
But you ladies know how horny they get!
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Michelle O: 'Questioning and criticism' of political leaders crucial.
We always take it well in Washington. No one loses their cool over anything. Chinese laugh, taking it for a joke. Michelle walks off stage in a rage.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Cuban doctors get a raise -- to $67 a month
Waiting list is now two years for a funeral. This is how Cuba has benefitted under the Castros!
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Jimmy Carter: 'My own communications are probably monitored'.
"But you guys know how I like to kid around. I was just repeating a mother-in-law deported to China joke. he he!"
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Today in History #4
In 1964, The Year of the Cat, actor Peter Lorre, 59, died in Los Angeles.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Today in History #3
In 1806, explorers Meriwether Lewis and William Clark, having reached the Pacific coast, began backtracking!
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Today In History #2
In 1775, Patrick Henry delivered an address to the Virginia Provincial Convention in which he is said to have declared, "Give me liberty, or Give Me a Raise!"
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Today In History
On this day in 1598, the Polish Pirate Ship, The Wojohowitz aborted the French Submarine, The PooPoo, drowning all men aboard.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Free Tattoos
California Tattoo artist does pre-20 year old rear tattoos for free.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1049
Snoops: Clint Eastwood directed the first two "Weekend At Bernies".
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1050
Snoops: In 1968 Marvel put out only issue #1 of "Cockroach Man", a major flop, but those are some of the most valuable comics collected today as most went unsold back to be destroyed.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1048
Snoops: Strictest group of vegetarians will not eat animal crackers.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1047
Snoops: Small Mass. town uses dog poop in park, cow manure just out of town for power sources. "Smells like shit outside but when the electric bill gets here, nothing but roses!", says citizen.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1046
Snoops: A squids eyes are as big as a watermelon, yet not nearly as tasty.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
CA Drought May Be Forcing Rabid Skunks Into Populated Areas.
PETA protests that skunks are only being skunks. Limbaugh: Headed for their counterparts in Hollywood.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
ABLOW: Pull the Plug on Naked TWITTER Teens.
Teens will be wearing nothing but rings and tattoos in the near future.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Hillary calls for 'mass movement' on climate change.
"There are just too few tornadoes and hurricanes the past few years."
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
March Tornado Drought May Set Record.
Here's hoping the same will apply in April!
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Russia sending warships toward South & Central America
Might have to protect them from bad old Americans if they suddenly got their minds off, drugs, actors and sports.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Ellen DeGeneres Is Out as Academy Awards Host--Producers Want More Fisticuffs in the Show
Hollywood-Variety reported today that producers of next year's show have contracted with Rosie O'Donnell and Donald Trump to do battle in a 15 round no-holds-barred fight as the Awards' main event.
written by Trinculoman, 23 March 2014
North Korea Threatens to End 60-Year Cease-Fire With South
But halts after SKorea inflates giant Wile E. Coyote, Yosemite Sam!
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Karzai: Taliban Working With U.S. to Keep War Going
That's not true says U.S. General. "We don't KNOW who we're working with. Somebody's always on vacation or playing golf."
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
FBI Chief Says 3D Printers Should Not Be Making Guns!
Sales still climbing as more guns created. Now they have a 3D Printer that creates 3D Printers.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Lady Gaga spews forth: This is no act
This is actually the way I look and act. I'm just as much an original as all those before me.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014
Man seen on cam stealing sex toys
Taking them to bathroom to try out.
written by Bureau, 23 March 2014