Scot's coffee is stronger than Italian!
Scientists have proven that Scottish coffee is stronger than Italian; aye laddie, just a wee dram!
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North Korea claim second Malaysian Plane in 2014!
Kim Jong-Un has claimed a second success in 2014 ever since U Tube took the piss out of him by kidnapping one and giving Ukrainian separatists a rocket launching set to blow Malaysian plane away!
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World Cup given to the Dutch!
Germany have been forced to hand over the World Cup to Holland because their ex-manager, LVG, insists that there was not one German playing and he's always right!
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Dutch airliner ventures into German airspace!
A Dutch airliner was spotted flying over Germany today and survived the ordeal although they were warned about high-flying Germans flying high since they won the World Cup!
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Syria call for a ceasefire!
Syria has decided to call it a day and offered their weapons to the Palestinians in an unprecedented show of Arabian solidarity. Hamas refused and declared war on the infidels; yet another one!
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Heatwave melts Iceland!
An approaching heatwave melted Iceland, luckily their personnel escaped without being hit by a passing Iceberg!
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Louis v Gaal fires Rooney!
Man Utd Dutch manager has fired Rooney because he earns 3 times as much and in Dutch tradition a subordinate can never earn more than the boss!
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Israel claim Hamas have W'OMD
To back up their self-claimed rights to bomb the shit out of Palestinians, Israel have spotted Arabs bearing a WOMD, an 86 year old grandma was last seen flashing her bloomers at Israeli soldiers!
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Not Enough Room To Swing A Cat
Did you know?
Manx cats have no tails. They were once used as a room "size gauge" by Estate Agents, who cruelly swung them around by their tails to measure rooms. Since then tails have been illegal.
written by Auntie Jean, 21 July 2014
Amazonian Tribes Making Blowpipes Out Of Old Bagpipes
Amazonian Bearded Pig huntng tribes are appealing for people to post old bagpipes to them. The pipes can be made into "sub machine gun " blow pipes firing 5 poisonous darts per second.
written by Auntie Jean, 21 July 2014
