The relationship with the USA is only special if Britain brings something to table
Uh, how about a spring chicken tart? Bottle of table whine?
written by queen mudder, 05 April 2014
Another Lab Rat Found Dead
New York Rat Pack say he should have stayed at home, not in their territory.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Egypt court sentences police captain in southern province to death
Egypt court sentences Islamic Brotherhood member's pet rabbit to death.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1188
Snoops: In the game of "Rock, Scissors and Paper", always choose Rock! That way you will win against Scissors and if Paper comes up, hit him in the head with Rock and run away with the money.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1187
Snoops: In the small town of Prance, New Hampshire the mayor and all the city council either boogie or buch dance when walking around town!
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1185
Snoops: One out of ten will lose a toe to mowing accidents this summer. Remember, Don't Drink & Mow Your Toe!"
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1184
Snoops: Following in Elvis Presley's footsteps, Justin Bieber is ready to do 50 singing/comedy movies all the same before Christmas. The first one will me, "Love My Tender".
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1183
Snoops: Although nearly forgotten today, one of Howdy Doody's brothers made one show appearance. He was in the Army at the time, was Private First Class K.P. Doody.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1182
Snoops: TV remotes were around in the 1950s. However, they were as big as a coffee table and made noises that set all the neighborhood dogs to barking.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1181
Snoops: Monarch butterflies have been seen at 4,000 feet in the air. And if it's a male, it still won't ask for directions.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1180
Snoops: Darwin traveled the world in a boat. Suffering from sea-sickness and fever. "I'm sick as spinning barrel of monkeys", he stated. However, others thought he said "We are born from the monkeys."
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Obama Budget Comments on Possible $20 Trillion Debt
"I'm doing my best to keep it below 25 Trillion by the time I leave."
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1178
Snoops: The only part of a real chicken in a Chicken McNugget is it's pecker!
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1177
Snoops: Bessie in Scotland has called off the search for her sister Nessies body.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1176
Snoops: On the first Thanksgiving Squanto's wife introduced the Pilgrims to BBQ Buffalo. Thus losing the entire nation to the white man.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1175
Snoops: The only major golf tournament that has ever been cancelled is the 1940 Masters was hit four days in a row by golf ball sized hail.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1174
Snoops: When that big apple fell on Sir Isaac Newton's head, it not only led him to discover gravity but to also learn that the knot on his head the size of an hen's egg won't go away overnight.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1173
Snoops: Placing a lit candle into your ear will not cause wax to flow but it will cause skin to burn.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Tyson recalls chicken nuggets
Some are believed to have actual chicken in them!
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Scientific Breakthrough
Scientists from Think Tank say they have built a better Al Gore and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Ask police to help round up old outdated models.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Evolutionists in Frenzy
After discovery of hidden limestone house with arrowheads, ancient pottery shards, mummy, B/W television.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Police Called in at Kentucky Resident
As Witnesses and Mormons get into brawl on front porch over who got there first.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Ringo Starr Brought in by Police
Accused of starting rumor that he was dead in order to sell latest CD "Remembering Ringo".
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Man Arrested for Carrying Box Cutter Aboard
Police also take his lawn chair and helium balloons as evidence!
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
VP Joe reassures public!
"Now don't you people start an Al Gore type rumor over animals running from Yellowstone's underground volcano. It's probably just a Bigfoot got the bison started and it happens all the time!"
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Today in History #11
1970 "Tiptoe Through the Tulips" by Tiny Tim is #1 for it's final run of 18 months as the top tune in Holland.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Today in History #10
Darwin sends first three chapters of The Origin of Species to his publisher, 1859. By the time they arrived, they had grown a tail.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Today in History #9
In 1974, Stephen King's first published novel, "Carrie," was released by Doubleday. "Carrie" was carried by hand to NYC by King. Also, "Carrie" was his only book with less that 3,000 pages.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Today in History #8
In 1964, Army General Douglas MacArthur died in Washington at age 84. Predictably, his last words were, "I Shall Return!"
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Today in History #7
In 1954, the U.S. Supreme Court, in FDC v. American Broadcasting Co., Inc., unanimously ruled that TV quiz shows did not violate lottery laws. "Let them eat TV dinners", joked one Supreme!
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Today in History #6
In 1895, Oscar Wilde lost his criminal libel case against the Marquess of Queensberry, who'd accused the writer of homosexual practices. Wilde had argued that he needed no practice!
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Today in History #5
1864, Ben Field & George M. Pullman received a U.S. patent for an "improvement in (rail) sleeping-cars" that consisted of folding upper berth. Before that, people were stepped on by toilet visitors.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Today in History #4
In 1764, Britain's Parliament passed The American Revenue Act of 1764, also known as The Sugar Act. This was changed in the 1980's as "The High Fructose Corn Syrup: Act.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Today in History #3
In 1621, the Mayflower sailed from Plymouth Colony in present-day Massachusetts on a monthlong return trip to England, after mistaking 3 other landings as "England", after seasickness.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Today in History #2
In 1614, England's King James I convened the second Parliament of his rule; the "Addled Parliament,". Everyone were drunk as skunks, thus "addled" being better term chosen later.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Today in History
1614, Pocahontas, Indian Chief Powhatan's daughter, married Englishman John Rolfe in the Virginia Colony. This brought peace between the white man and Native Americans permanently, until April 6th.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Volcano Erupts in Ecuador
Something definitely going on. In Australia, thousands of lemmings commit suicide.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Israel, Palestinians, US meet to avoid talks collapse
Kerry: We have got to put on some kind of show for the cameras, guys. We've wasted a lot of money.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
New NSA Spying Machine Works.
NSA, Google Earth, 500 satellites, can bring your face into view..yet could not see missing airplane?
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Machine can tell whether person liberal or conservative...
It either blows trumpet blast or Hee-Haws!
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Angry mob attacks Ebola treatment centre in Guinea
Most stupid act of the year so far. Don't they realize they need to be as far awhile from Ebola Treatment as possible?
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Unemployment stuck at 6.7%...
Figure doesn't include the 50% who have quit looking.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Somalia Pirates Have The Bomb?
Claim they made one by collecting radioactive waters off Japanese leaks.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Japan orders military to strike any new North Korea missile launches.
We are determined that Kim not land another weapon in the Ocean as it's polluted enough already.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
STOCKS Spooked after hitting highs!
Many blaming investors paying visits to Denver, Seattle!
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
United States Has New Weapon
It's apparently called "The Earth Splitter" and is so powerful it will cockroaches also. Of course we only need one.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
Guru Statistician Behind Obamacare Numbers Identified
Obamacare numbers reported by White House are the work product of Bonzo, Senior Chimp Statistician, San Diego Zoo. He throws darts at a board plastered in millions & the stuck number is sent to Obama.
written by Trinculoman, 05 April 2014
Russia probes cheese factory after workers shown bathing in milk.
There's a hair in my colby longhorn cheese! Here's another one in the yogurt.
written by Bureau, 05 April 2014
