True Facts From Snoops #1270
Snoops: The cleanest air in the world is at the North Pole but not when Santa returns and all the reindeer farts begin. Then it's in Tasmania.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1269
Snoops: The biggest hummingbirds weigh less than a quarter yet weigh more than a thousand dollar bill!
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1268
Snoops: Many U.S. political leaders sat that the fact that few older people are dying ruining social security. AARP says they are against forcing older people to die.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Florida woman says bears dragged her from garage
Between the gators, snakes and bears, we're thinking of leaving.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Journalist Wearing Google Glass Claims He Was Attacked
Device Smashed In SF Mission District. Others vow to smash any hidden cameras.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Teacher who 'ordered a hit' on 7th grader gets fired
Wanted six 8th Grade boys to beat kid up!
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1267
Snoops: In the song "Me and Bobby McGee" the lyrics are "Dirty red Bandana", not "Dirty red Banana!"
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1266
Snoops: The number one phobia in America? A spider Clown.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1265
Snoops: Your feet grow bigger during the day but not your hands. No one knows why.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1264
Snoops: In three different episodes of "Barnaby Jones", other actors slipped up and called Buddy Epson "Uncle Jed".
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1263
Snoops: NASA has found evidence of piss on the moon. They are questioning astronauts. "Who or what did it? Why is it still there?"
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1262
Snoops: The wild antics of Chief Crazy Horse pretty much overshadowed his less colorful brother, Chief Stupid Ass!
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Pulitzer Prize winners announced
And here they are receiving their prize: Sorry, The Spoof video seems to be down temporarily. Try later.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Coney Island amusement rides open for the summer
Snow predicted in the forecast! Freeze later in week?
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Nurses in Britain 'stretched to breaking point'.
"We have to make up for all the docs that left here and are still leaving."
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
IRS chief: New rule on way for tax-exempt groups.
"Or should I say, FORMER tax exempt groups?"
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Obama has Proposed 442 Tax Hikes Since Taking Office.
"Let me tell you how it will be. There's one for you, nineteen for me. 'Cause I'm the taxman. Yeah, I'm the taxman."
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Double Dutch or just plain green!
The Dutch have started illuminating their streets with green neon paint hoping to attract aliens looking for Koffie Shops!
written by unknown
Little-Known Legal Challenge That Could Torpedo Obamacare
It's so little known that I haven't a clue. However, there are about six challenges that will have to be ruled on. So ObamaCare doesn't look very stable at this point.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
First Hurricane Named
The first Hurricane according to the Weather Channel will be called, "A-Hole". "We need improvement in our ratings!"
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Still Another Sign Economy Down
More than 25,000 prostitutes say they are out of work. All 25,000 located in college towns. "We can't compete with it being free."
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Another Sign Economy Worsening
Case Knives reports that they had cut over 300 workers at factory.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Wisdom of King Rootin Tootin #63
"A penny saved is a penny earned. I never could understand that one. Of course it comes from the Scots with their pennies. And, of course, I've never worked for a penny in my life."
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Wisdom From King Rootin Tootin #62
I told the Queen that the workers need bread. She says that they have been breeding too much already.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Wisdom From King Rootin Tootin #61
"Great minds have purposes, others have wishes. I just wish I had a purpose. Where the Queen wishes she had a purchase every day! What is it now?"
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
More Stay-At-Homes Than Ever
More Mom and Dad Stay-At-Home couples than ever according to polls. Flimsy reason: Looking for a job openings on computers.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Rare Tiny Chinese Cup Auctioned for $36 Million
Before discovery it was being used as cat food dish.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
General Motors Recalls Car Rentals
General Motors has recalled thousands of cars of all makes that have been rented. Wherever you are, go to a GM Rental establishment and pick up a Segway to return home.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Food Stamp Recipients Outnumber Women Who Work Full-Time.
Welfare recipients outnumbering workers looks bad for the economy. Taxes to increase?
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
'Rats the size of cats are invading our cities!'
Two-foot long giant rodents that are immune to poison are found feeding from bins across Britain. Real rats, not politicians.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
UEFA kicks Ukrainian teams out of Champions League!
Ukrainian teams will not be allowed to play Champions League next season because UEFA needs the gas to sponsor their competition and the Ukraine has none!
written by unknown
Russian tanks roll over Ukraine!
Putin has sent his tanks in and they are now rolling over the Ukraine, Obama asked him not too but thought, "It's a gas" and that's more important than a Ukraine without gas!
written by unknown
Liverpool yobs stone City snobs!
"Stone the Mancs," they screamed as Liverpool yobs attacked a bus carrying the Light Blues and not the Reds. Just goes to show how desperate life is when there's no Red Mancs left to roll over!
written by unknown
Dwarf planet found in our solar system
"Looks like little people walking around, building things, twerking", say astronomer.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #15
1948 - US performs atmospheric nuclear test at Enwetak. Many families attend bringing picnic supplies.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #14
1341 - Sad Sack of Saluzzo (Italy) defeated by Italian-Angevine troops under Manfred V of Saluzzo.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #13
1191 - 85-year old Giacinto Bobo Theoclownus becomes Pope Coelestinus III
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #12
1028 - German emperor Conrad II the Sailor crowns his son Henry III, better known as 'Popeye' king.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #11
193 - Lucius Septimus Bodegas Farticus Severus crowned emperor of Rome.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #10
In 1965, the state of Kansas hanged Richard Hickock and Perry Smith for the 1959 murders of four members of Herbert Clutter's family. Among those in the crowd, Truman Capote.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #9
In 1964, conservationist Rachel Carson, author of "Silent Spring," died of Malaria in Silver Spring, Md., at age 56.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #8
In 1939, the John Steinbeck novel "The Wrath of Grapes" was first published by Viking Press. The title was change for the second printing.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #7
In 1910, Pres. Taft became the 1st U.S. chief executive to throw the ceremonial first pitch at baseball game as the Washington Senators beat the Philadelphia Athletics 3-0, their only win that season.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #6
In 1828, the first edition of Noah Webster's "American Version of the Way of English Talking" was published. Title changed later.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #5
In 1775, the first American society for the abolition of slavery was formed in Philadelphia. Only 90 years later, it was accomplished.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #4
Soviets to withdraw from Afghanistan, 1988. United States, others lusting over all that sand and rock.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #3
U.S. fliers in first dogfight over western front, 1918. Snoopy in dogfight with the Red Baron!
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History #2
Country legend Loretta Lynn is born in Butcher Hollow, Kentucky, 1935. Along with Jean Ritchie brings attention to plight of coal miners.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Today in History
1912. Titanic ship hits iceberg. Those in charge say it's not my fault, something we hear a lot today. Why not detour away from the ice?
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Turkey PM accuses TWITTER of tax evasion.
TWITTER: What's the old Turkey gobbling about now?
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
NKorea's Kim Presents Volunteers
Plans stepped up to send colony to settle on the sun,
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Next Best to Cloaking Device
US Navy christens huge $3 billion destroyer ship USS Zumwalt that appears as a fishing boat on enemy radar.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
GM sends recall notices to parents after son killed in car.
First bad cars, then bad judgement.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Hookers turning Airbnb apartments into temporary brothels
"Have Hookers License, Will Travel! Call Bernice for a good time while in NYC."
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Pot vending machine to debut in Denver #3
Robot machine will be visiting people all over the cities, accompanied by guards.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Pot vending machine to debut.#2
You can go directly from pot machine to snack machines.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
Pot vending machine to debut in Denver
Bet a lot of these things will be turned upside down and broken into.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1261
Snoops: Before his death, Boris Karloff stated that Fred Gwynne made a better Frankenstein monster than himself.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1260
Snoops: Dogs are banned from Antarctica because they could carry disease to the seals. Also, their pissing on the ice could cause a rise in the ocean.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1259
Snoops: Thomas Edison didn't invent the first incandescent bulb, but he invented the first one to work.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1258
Snoops: Ben Franklin invented a stove, bifocal glasses and a "Long Arm" that assisted you in reaching things on the top shelves. This "Long Arm" is still used by law officer to this day.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
True Facts From Snoops #1057
Snoops: The longest nose on a human being was 3.86 inches, slightly over four inches once Jimmy Durante after he had his teeth pulled.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014
According to Snoops: #1256
Snoops: Fashion designers invented two 'cat ears' to clip onto your head to respond to your moods, up or down. No, they didn't work for any other part of the body.
written by Bureau, 14 April 2014