Thrifty Tips #8

Funny story written by birbee

Monday, 14 September 2009

At this time of year, many many people have colds, influenza, swine flu, man flu, bird flu, bovine flu, equine flu and many other variants.

They all have one thing in common: a runny nose that you have to blow and blow until your hooter is red raw.

There are many different types of tissues on the market, some containing a moisturiser to try and combat this, but these are expensive and so in the latest Thrifty Tip we are on hand to show you how you can have a nose as soft as a baby's bum for very little money thus saving even more.

'Plenty', the kitchen roll advertised on the telly by the hairy blokes dressed as women, the one that used to be called 'Bouny', is the stuff to buy.

"But this is more expensive!" I hear you cry.

Well bear with me, as it will be money well spent.

Buy your Plenty and once you have blown your nose a few times and it is really full of greeny yellowy stuff, don't throw it away, rinse it under the tap and wash all the snot away.

Wring most of the excess water away and you will find that your rinsed tissue retains a certain amount of your own mucas which acts as a natural soother to your ravaged nose.

This, you will probably find, is just as good, if not nearly or more, than the most expensive top of the range tissue.

And with a little care, the same tissue can be used about 36 times before wear and tear start to show.

'Plenty' not endorsed by anyone remotely connected to the world of medicine.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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