Written by Proffitt

Wednesday, 13 October 2010

image for Courtney Cox 'No sex ended our marriage'
Arquette wanted me to suck his lollypop

Courteney Cox today revealed the true reason behind the breakdown of her marriage to David Arquette - a sex ban.

Yes, Cox (46) said 'We haven't had sex for over 6 months now, well not in the same room anyway.' She blames David's lack of maturity, depth and emotional understanding of her own needs.

'I told David he needed to realise the undulating flow of my emotional membranes as they journeyed on life's oceans. I begged him to whisk me off to lands of uncompromising love and beauty and allow me to float like a feather on the wind of unity. When he failed to lift me I banned sex until he agreed to make the effort.

But David had other ideas. Cox explained 'He wasn't the slightest bit interested in my needs and requirements. He just kept talking about his own needs such as how important it was that we do it 'doggy fashion' with me in a see through teddy outfit while I looked out the window talking to our postman.'

'Oh, and don't get me started on the whole bum sex thing while sitting on the expressway....'

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: courtney cox




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