Vanessa Feltz in new bid to shed weight

Funny story written by Stevey G.

Wednesday, 30 June 2010

image for Vanessa Feltz in new bid to shed weight
Vanessa's new diet...'Now where did I put that liquidiser?'

Vanessa Feltz announced today her intention to shed weight using a method suggested by her personal trainer.

Miss Feltz (48), said 'I no longer want to be regarded as the poster girl for fat people. Let's face it the posters are not getting any smaller'

Miss Feltz has tried various diets over the years but with only limited success and blames 'lack of will-power' as the cause of her spiralling weight gain.

Now, at a whopping 18st 4lbs in stocking feet and a diver's helmet, she has decided to experiment with a plan suggested by her personal trainer.

'The idea is that I can eat whatever I want, but only through a straw', she told this reporter today.'Basically therefore this should not only reduce the type of food that I can eat, but it will also take longer to eat meals.Using this method I hope to come down from my current dress size of 20-22 to a size zero over the next week or so.'

Well best of luck with that Vanessa.

We have subsequently learned that Miss Feltz has commissioned a special straw to assist in her attempt, being 18 inches long and three inches wide!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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