Supermarket Sweep the Movie to be made

Written by Ben Macnair

Tuesday, 16 October 2007

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Supermarket Sweep (But no Sooty)

'Next time you are in the supermarket, and you hear the beep - Think of the fun you could be having on supermarket sweep!' This, the catch phrase in the late lamented Television show, Supermarket Sweep, and now the icon of British tack, which starred orange/man crossover Dale Winton is to be made into an action adventure movie starring Clint Eastwood, and in a rare cameo appearance, Graham Norton.

The plot which steals from the story-line of Speed sees a supermarket under threat of explosion if there are less than 50 beeps in an hour. The film, which will be made in real time to add to the thrilling excitement will also see Peter Duncan, Sandra Bullock, and Sting impersonator Gordon Sumner in a fight with terrorists intent on blowing up the frozen food section.

Animal rights activists were also concerned about the damage that might be inflicted upon dead, unsuspecting animals. One of their people told one of our people: 'It is just so wrong. If it has a face, it has been alive, and has had a soul, it should not be eaten, frozen, or have any other unnatural scientific experiment carried out on in, and that goes for the frozen animals as much as it does for Graham Norton, and Dale Winton'.

Supermarket Sweep starring Dale Winton, Clint Eastwood, Graham Norton, Peter Duncan, Sandra Bullock, Gordon Sumner, Helen Mirren as the Queen, directed by Ken Loach will be released next Autumn. Be afraid, be very afraid.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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