Written by queen mudder

Monday, 5 February 2007

image for Kylie stuffed in London museum
Kylie, utterly stuffed

London - (Rioters): Antipodean bimbo crooner Kylie Minogue is set to be stuffed and exhibited in London's Unnatural Hystery Museum as part of Australian Culture Week begining tomorrow.

The exhibition will feature hundreds of items of personal clothing, hair pieces, sanitary protection and tacky little bits of jewellery donated by her family after unsuccessful attempts to flog it on eBay.

Museum bosses said they hope the show will revive Minogue's yoyoing acting career after rumors that she may get a part in Roman Polanski's forthcoming remake of the disaster movie Up Pompeii!

This has been scripted by fellow Oz Rolf Harris around a fantasy featuring Roman gladiators crucifying a heretical kangaroo on the eve of Mount Vesuvius's eruption.

Kylie is set to play the part of the Biblical woman who mops the tortured kangaroo's brow, which creates a Turin shroud-like image on the cloth known as Saint Verruca's Veil.

The London exhibition is the first of many that desperate curators are staging after a series of earlier disasters featuring infected taxidermy items which are currently under investigation for spreading mad cow disease and foot in mouth to gullible museum tourists.

Kylie Minogue is 43.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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