Written by TAR

Wednesday, 8 February 2012

image for Ke$ha Gets 'Down & Dirty'
'Let's Get Naked'

Ke$ha opens up wide in the March issue of Glitz magazine, ditching her garbage bin look for… something that resembles a person who regularly takes showers, uses soap and rinses.

Inside she blabbers on about her obsession for peekaboo penis and promises fans that the follow-up to her 2010 album Wild Animal Farm will show her vulnerable side and likely her big bottom too. This might translate to less lyrics about hard liquor is quicker and just do me one more time, Franzia.

Of special note, she reveals to Glitz how she manages to dig herself out of the ground and clean up her foul dirty persona:

Darla Pennington from Glitz gets down, dirty and personal with Ke$ha. 

"Oh, the body dirt stays. It's my favorite wild thing to do. Sometimes I have stinking dirt parties at my house in Nashville and it's dirty clothing-optional, and we just body-mud-paint each other and run around nakkkked, and I have a giant mud stained grass bed. I'm very much in touch with that earthy side of myself."

"Who isn't amused by a huge giant floppy penis? I find they kinda grow on me and take on a whole different identity.  Sometimes when I'm sadistically sad, desparate and horned like a toad, I make my assistants put on designer Dirk Diggler outfits and boom, boom, boom around my house, " squeeled Ke$ha.

She doesn't just see dick when she's sad-she has several big lad parties weekly, adding: "Don't get me wrong: I do destroy a few wankers on a weekly basis. It's a hobby. I'm an in heat praying mantis. They **** me, and then I eat them alive."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Ke$ha

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