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Showing page 8 (of 15 pages)
Late-night comedians find "gold mine" in Obama
Late-night comedians: "Barack Obama is not only amusing in himself, but the cause of amusement in others as well," a "gold mine" of material. "All you have to do is wait for him to open his mouth."
written by Gee Pee, 05 August 2013
Anthony Weiner: "New Yawk loves me!"
In a text message to a woman he sexually harassed over his cell phone, Anthony Weiner said New Yawk "loves me" and vowed to send every resident of the city a photo of his weiner.
written by Gee Pee, 05 August 2013
Anthony Weiner: "New Yawk loves me!"
In a text message to a woman he sexually harassed over his cell phone, Anthony Weiner said New Yawk "loves me" and vowed to send every resident of the city a photo of his weiner.
written by Gee Pee, 05 August 2013
Colin Powell reportedly had interracial affair
For the sake of race relations, Sexretary of State Colin Powell reportedly had an affair with Romania's blonde bombshell, "diplomat" Corina Cretu. "We were intimate," he admits, "but never got naked."
written by Gee Pee, 02 August 2013
Monica Lewinsky sex tape?
The National Enquirer claims to have unearthed a sex tape in which Monica Lewinsky issues President Clinton an invitation to the "Orifice Orifice," where she will allow him "executive privileges."
written by Gee Pee, 02 August 2013
Seattle bans use of "offensive" language
Seattle officials banned "hate speech" as offensive and "dangerous," outlawing the use, in government documents, of such "incendiary" terms as "conservative," "Republican," "democracy," and "freedom."
written by Gee Pee, 02 August 2013
Cop snaps "personal" photo of George Zimmerman
During a recent traffic stop "for no reason," a Horny, Texass cop snapped a "candid" photo of George Zimmerman. The cop also reportedly bought him flowers and asked him for a date.
written by Gee Pee, 02 August 2013
Obama adopts isolationist policy
On the pretext of protecting American embassies from Benghazi-type attacks, President Obama is closing embassies across the globe. "With falling ratings, I don't need more phony scandals," he said.
written by Gee Pee, 02 August 2013
Jennifer Aniston stuns Chelsea Handler
During an interview with bosom buddy Chelsea Handler, Jennifer Aniston stunned the comedienne, telling her that journalist Katie Couric is "illegitimate," which makes "her both a bitch and a bastard."
written by Gee Pee, 02 August 2013
"Project Runway" billboards removed
Project Runway billboards were removed from display in Los Angeles after LGBT community complaints. "The models are all hetero," they charged, "whereas L. A., especially West Hollywood, is all homo."
written by Gee Pee, 01 August 2013
Girlie mags no longer acceptable to U. S. servicemen
U. S. military bases no longer stock Playboy, Penthouse, or other girlie magazines. "Our men in uniform are too effeminate to buy such magazines," President Obama said proudly.
written by Gee Pee, 01 August 2013
War on women continues as Aussie bosses tell female employees to "button up"
Worried about sex harassment, Australian employers have ordered female employees to "dress appropriately" during work. Translation? No more displays of boobs and buns. No see-through blouses. No fun.
written by Gee Pee, 01 August 2013
Putin: Russia may detain some Olympic athletes
Although Russian law allows the government to detain lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender foreigners, Vladimir Putin insists that LGBT Olympics athletes will be held "only if they win gold medals."
written by Gee Pee, 01 August 2013
Bill Clinton embraces "alternate lifestyle"
Former president Bill Clinton announced that, at Hillary's request, he is embracing an "alternate lifestyle." "I'm going to give celibacy a try," he said.
written by Gee Pee, 01 August 2013
Queen Elizabeth explains herself
After angering two-thirds of her countrymen for endorsing gay marriage legislation, Her Majesty has explained her motivation: "I'm afraid a few royals may want to marry someone of their own sex."
written by Gee Pee, 30 July 2013
San Diego mayor agrees to therapy for "sex addiction"
San Diego mayor Bob Filner (D, naturally), agreed to undergo therapy for his alleged "sex addiction," provided that the city pay for it. "It's important that the world hears my story," he said.
written by Gee Pee, 30 July 2013
Justin Bieber's bus arrested
Teen idol Justin Bieber's magical mystery tour bus was arrested for posession of marijuana and drug paraphenalia, but he was not aboard. "I'd had enough the night before," he said.
written by Gee Pee, 30 July 2013
Dressing right
SALINAS, CA - When a Salinas high school principal banned students from wearing thong panties, coeds responded by not wearing any underclothes at all. The principal agrees they meet the dress code.
written by Gee Pee, 29 July 2013
Students: "There's no fool like an old fool!"
A geriatrics professor at Miami University, Oxford, Ohio, refuses to stop wearing his thong swimsuit at the school pool, citing the "educational value" of the display.
written by Gee Pee, 29 July 2013
Get 'em while they're hot!
NEW YAWK - Mayoral candidate Anthony Weiner's campaign manager quit after Weiner sent photos of his weiner to young women. If his election bid fails, Weiner says, "I can always sell hotdogs."
written by Gee Pee, 29 July 2013
Victim "flattered," but says assailant needs "anatomy lessons"
LONDON - A man followed a woman around Walmart, pretended to bump and grind into her, and tossed a handful of semen onto her buttocks. "I'd hoped she'd have my baby," he explained.
written by Gee Pee, 29 July 2013
NIH scientist discovers anti-Alzheimer's gene in mice
Dr. Al Schiemerz found a gene that prevents Alzheimer's in mice, but, a victim himself of the disease, cannot remember whether humans also have the gene. "Maybe it will come to me," he hopes.
written by Gee Pee, 27 July 2013
Indiana State University honors Larry Bird
Indiana State University, Home of the Hoosiers, honored basketball star Larry Bird with a statue of the pro player poised to shoot a hoop. The pedestal reads, "White men can't shoot (except Larry.)"
written by Gee Pee, 27 July 2013
Pelosi blasts Weiner for "disrespect toward women"
Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi blasted New York mayoral candidate Anthony Weiner for disrespecting women: "The bastard never sexted me with a picture of his weiner!" she complained.
written by Gee Pee, 27 July 2013
Showing page 8 (of 15 pages)
