Showing breaking news satire snippets written by Mr Goster.
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Violent Owner Bites Dog
In what was a quite mindless act of violence,animal Terry Beard,42,from a council estate,bit his dog,Wesley,a West Highland Terrier with a pronounced limp.
An eye witness said 'He's a nutter him.'
written by Mr Goster, 03 February 2011
It's Official - Clarkson's A Tosser
It's taken 4 years to complete but the poll to find the answer 'Is Clarkson A Tosser' is officially over. 28,000 people took part including Jeremy himself and his Mum.Only ONE person answered 'No'.
written by Mr Goster, 03 February 2011
Old Lady Swallows Fly
There was an old lady who swallowed a fly and nobody knows why she swallowed the fly but it lodged in her windpipe, and struggling for breath, it killed her. Very sad news.
written by Mr Goster, 03 February 2011
Milkman Delivers Twins
It's usually 2 pints and 6 eggs, but milkman Dave Potts over delivered this morning when he helped a young mother give birth to twins.
'All in a day's work for me' said the gold top hero.
written by Mr Goster, 03 February 2011
Madonna Buys African Village
Breaking news,still sexy singer Madonna has gone the whole nine yards and bought a full village in Burkino Faso, Africa.She quipped 'It's gonna be cool,now all my friends can have celebrity babies.'
written by Mr Goster, 02 February 2011
Toulouse Lautrec's Physical Challenge
In France until the 1860's it was illegal to be taller than 5 feet 2".Famous French Short Arse Toulouse Lautrec was the last to be born before the height ban was lifted and luckily was only 5ft 1".
written by Mr Goster, 02 February 2011
Now That's Cold
In Entertainment news,it was so cold last night in New York that the Empire Theater's adaptation of Swan Lake actually froze.
written by Mr Goster, 02 February 2011
Torres In U-Turn Shocker
It's just emerged that during the exciting Transfer saga surrounding Fernando Torres' record move to Chelsea he did a U-Turn at a set of lights.
An eye-witness said 'it was a terrible manouevre!'
written by Mr Goster, 01 February 2011
Sympathy For The Revels
Outrage today as the makers of Revels withdrew them from the market.Chocolatier Humphrey Wispa explained ' I work closely with the Revel family and warned them nobody likes the coffee ones.'
written by Mr Goster, 30 January 2011
Vodafone FreeBees Aren't Real Bees
The Bees in the Vodafone FreeBees advert aren't real,and are actually 2 vertically challenged out of work actors in suits.Bee expert Barry 'Buzz' Wightbeer said 'Real bees can't act.'
written by Mr Goster, 30 January 2011
'Mild Green Fairy Liquid'
Twinkle Toed Fruity Celebrity Louie Spence has put his name to a new range of cleaning products.Speaking about 'Fairy Liquids' Louie said 'I'll clean up with these products Darling.'
written by Mr Goster, 30 January 2011
Liz Hurley In No Talent Shocker
Celebrity news just in.Top Showbiz Magazine 'Take Another Break You Lazy Cow' this week proves that 'actress' and model Elizabeth Hurley has no talent whatsoever.Never has had,never will have.
written by Mr Goster, 28 January 2011
You Know Where You Were
Everyone says 'I remember where I was when Kennedy died' such was the enormity of the incident.Well today a team of Dallas Scientists proved it never happened.
An Insider said 'It never happened.'
written by Mr Goster, 27 January 2011
Foreign Legion Sue Jedward
Those fantastically talented supertwins Jedward are being taken to court for deserting their posts whilst serving in The Foreign Legion.They sneaked out one night and Louis Walsh picked them up.
written by Mr Goster, 26 January 2011
Foreign Legion Sue Jedward
Those fantastically talented supertwins Jedward are being taken to court for deserting their posts whilst serving in The Foreign Legion.They sneaked out one night and Louis Walsh picked them up.
written by Mr Goster, 26 January 2011
Jordan or Katie? Best Foot Forward
Celebrity magazine 'Total Bollocks' this week revealed in a survey that 78% of UK men would rather eat their own feet than go for a meal with Jordan/Katie Price.The other 22% fancied Alex Reid.
written by Mr Goster, 23 January 2011
Jimmy Weds Alicia
After a whirlwind smile funny faced funny man Jimmy Carr will marry popular R&B singer Alicia Keys.At the ceremony,always the man for a one liner,Jimmy quipped'She will be known as Alicia Carr-Keys'
written by Mr Goster, 21 January 2011
Liam Gallagher Vow Shocker
Music news just in,ex-Oasis front man Liam Gallagher has vowed to fans he will write a song that DOESN'T sound like The Beatles before he dies.He said to reporters this morning 'I'm working on it!'
written by Mr Goster, 21 January 2011
Showing page 7 (of 7 pages)
