Showing breaking news satire snippets written by Inchcock.
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Showing page 45 (of 54 pages)
Tory MP Ed Vaizey has claimed 8p Travel Expenses!
For a car journey of just over 1,000 yards.
New regulator IPSA - set up after the expenses scandal - dealt with 34,000 claims worth £5.2million in June and July alone.
'Amazing!'
written by Inchcock, 07 November 2011
Ed Miliband yesterday repaid £1,725, claimed in "an administrative error"
For Three months' rent on his constituency flat in Doncaster was claimed for and paid twice.
'And it only took him eight months to realise?'
written by Inchcock, 07 November 2011
Antolin Alcaraz in spitting row during match
The Paraguayan sparked an 82nd-minute ruck after spitting at Wolves defender Richard Stearman and could face a three-match ban, or being sent to Alcatraz if the FA decide to investigate.
written by Inchcock, 07 November 2011
Seven winners of the £100,000 Health Lottery top prize on Saturday night!
I'm so glad its popular, this will help pay for the American Consultancy firm that gets receives £290,000 a year from UK Government to oversee the NHS cuts!!!
written by Inchcock, 07 November 2011
1000's of well-paid Brit jobs are being offered to Romanians as millions of homegrown workers languish on the dole.
A new report said 4,000 positions in the UK were up for grabs via employment agencies in Romania. Including £2,000-a-month cab drivers and nurses.
Unemployed in the UK - click here
written by Inchcock, 07 November 2011
Wealthy Pakistan cricket cheats were given more than £100,000 of taxpayers' money to fund their legal defence!
Oh I am pleased!
written by Inchcock, 07 November 2011
David Cameron has full confidence in Home Secretary Theresa May!
Who has not offered to resign as a result of the controversy over border checks, the Prime Minister's official spokesman said today.
Or as misprinted in the Oldham Times, Theresa Maybe?
written by Inchcock, 07 November 2011
August babies are less likely to go on to top universities, says top FSI study!
FSI researchers say August babies under-perform compared with older children in their school year and throughout their working lives!
Well, now I know why I'm as thick as a plank!
written by Inchcock, 04 November 2011
£180,000 Think-tank on Spending Cuts declares its findings!
Cuts to education, benefits and pensions likely to lead to deeper inequalities in the future, says leading social policy think-tank.
And they needed an £180,000 think-tank to work that one out?
written by Inchcock, 04 November 2011
Squatters are as bad as thieves!
Justice Minister Ken Clarke MP QC: Says 'Squatters as bad as thieves'
Would that include tax fiddling MPs, Ministers who do not pay their taxes, Ministers who are nepotists by any chance?
written by Inchcock, 02 November 2011
Jack Straw took undeclared cash from car insurance industry!
The former Labour cabinet minister Jack Straw was paid £5,000 by the motor insurance industry for a speech and question-and-answer session.
Well I am surprised!
written by Inchcock, 02 November 2011
Countries who persecute homosexuals will see the amount of aid money they receive from the UK cut, Cameron announces!
Pensioners about to freeze to death, unemployment at a record high, police stations fire-bombed, daily protests, food prices rising, and the unfair cut-backs... is that all he is worried about?
written by Inchcock, 02 November 2011
Cameron says ships can fire back at Somali pirates!
Mr Cameron said: Ships sailing under our flag will for the first time be allowed to hire armed guards.
What about the proletariat shooting, lying, moral-hijacking crooked MPs?
written by Inchcock, 02 November 2011
Tory minister Chris Grayling tells the jobless to take casual work!
He said taking temporary jobs such as becoming a Christmas postman would help "give you an idea of the kind of career you want"
I think he should join his namesakes fish in a deep river!
written by Inchcock, 01 November 2011
Law Professor Malcolm Grant put in charge of NHS budget
The Millionaire New Zealander, chosen for the post by Health Secretary Andrew Lansley, has revealed: "I don't use the NHS"
Well fancy that!
written by Inchcock, 01 November 2011
11 prison officers are being paid to guard a jail with no inmates.
Latchmere House, in Richmond, South West London, was closed last month but staff still work there to provide "security".
No really, it's true!
written by Inchcock, 01 November 2011
Money - described in the year 3000
A type of currency, in the 20-21st century, politicians, drug pushers, and businessmen became addicted to. Causing many robberies, fiddling, conning, deaths, wars, and genocide.
written by Inchcock, 31 October 2011
Good News for Lib-Dems in October 2011 Voting Intentions Poll!
They have increased their share of the votes this month!
Conservatives 35%
Labour 42%
Lib-Dems 7%
Others 16%
written by Inchcock, 31 October 2011
Criminals to have weekly benefits docked by up to £25 to pay fines!
David Cameron to announce plans that will allow maximum weekly payment to increase fivefold.
It is uncertain if criminal MPs will be included?
written by Inchcock, 31 October 2011
Kenneth Clarke to investigate Parent allowing their children to drink Alcohol
He said that 7 out of 10 underage children were caught drinking this summer, and given the alcohol by their parents.
Clarke said; "Thankfully my parent were the same (hic)!"
written by Inchcock, 31 October 2011
Millionaire Chancellor Osborne get award!
In appreciation of his increase in VAT, and cuts in Pensioners Heating allowance, the Gadaffi.com site thanked him for killing so many more British people... more than Gadaffi ever did!
written by Inchcock, 31 October 2011
Cameron admits Tory memberships is dwindling!
His only consolation is that the Coalition has all but destroyed the Lib-Dem membership!
written by Inchcock, 31 October 2011
Fishermen net a Nazi sea-mine!
Fishermen's spokesman Tommy Roe commented; "All the Nazi mines put together did less damage to the fishing industry than the Government of England has in the last ten years!"
written by Inchcock, 28 October 2011
Showing page 45 (of 54 pages)
