Showing breaking news satire snippets written by Inchcock.
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Showing page 37 (of 54 pages)
Football Transfer Fees
Fulham bid £8.35m for Dortmund Lucas Barrice.
Chelsea bid £44m for Torres from Liverpool.
Nottingham Forest OAP fan, forced to pay £1.17 for a cuppa at QMC hospital!
written by Inchcock, 02 February 2012
Prince Andrew: "At least we've our own currency"
Daily Mail: He boasted it had another huge advantage - its own currency, not the ailing euro.
"Yes, but some of 'us' have more than others!"
written by Inchcock, 02 February 2012
Dixons chief John Browett leaves to join Apple
He will be responsible for Apple's retail strategy and the continued expansion of the technology giant's stores.
"He should do well, after all he's brought Dixons (+ Curry's & PC World) to their financial knees!"
written by Inchcock, 02 February 2012
William Hague flies to the UN in New York
For talks over a draft resolution demanding that President Bashar Assad step aside.
"I wonder who he'll sleep with in the hotel bedroom this time?"
written by Inchcock, 02 February 2012
Prince Harry says: Queen fulfils duties that "she shouldn't be doing at her age"
She should try duties like elderly Spoofer's have to do, like:
* Queuing up for a bus-pass
* Explaining to Gas Co, why she cannot pay the bill
* Waiting for 5 months for her NHS hearing aids repair
"Well..."
written by Inchcock, 02 February 2012
75 captives in cell made for 4 as evil hijackers are rounded up
Pirates, Murderers and al Shabaab terrorists endure 24 hours a day in a cage with no basic sanitation.
Prisoner's rattling the single door has his hands bashed by guards.
"Great... tell Ken Clarke someone!"
written by Inchcock, 02 February 2012
Cash for childcare is slashed by George Osborne
He's ruthlessly slashing childcare funding despite pledging millions to help hard-up families, it was revealed.
"Now why I wonder should a millionaire minister do such a thing?"
written by Inchcock, 01 February 2012
Four out of five UK criminals using a knife - not imprisoned!
Criminals, gangsters, burglars, muggers, pimps etc... Welcome to Britain!
written by Inchcock, 01 February 2012
RBS Chief Executive to get only £963,000 bonus this year!
The RBS board agreed yesterday to pay chief executive Stephen Hester "only" £963,000. It was originally to give him £7m
"Well I think we should have a collection for him - don't you?"
written by Inchcock, 31 January 2012
Audley Harrison is planning a surprise return to boxing!
The heavyweight Strictly Come Dancing star will fight Ali Adams at the Brentwood Centre on April 14 2012.
"Well he's got nerve, give him that much!"
written by Inchcock, 30 January 2012
Police numbers down 6,800 to 10-year low in Tory cuts!
How many more victims will there be before MPs realise that people are afraid to go out at night for fear of being mugged, or stay at home for fear of being burgled?
"Cameron... you're a nepotist!"
written by Inchcock, 29 January 2012
27-01-12: Voting Intention Poll UK - Is it valid?
Con's 40%
Labour 40%
LibDem 9%
Others 11%
"It's the choices on offer that causes the problems really!"
written by Inchcock, 28 January 2012
Rooney set to miss Liverpool clash after failing to recover from knee and ankle knocks
28.01.12: It's not certain whether the injuries were inflicted by his wife Coleen, or Jennifer the second prostitute he's been caught knocking off!
written by Inchcock, 28 January 2012
Minister Grant Shapps: More help for people leaving hospital
Housing Minister Grant Shapps has launched a new deal to help older people to continue living comfortably in their own homes.
"Yes I believe that - like when they said there will not be any increase in VAT - Remember?"
written by Inchcock, 28 January 2012
UK: Housing Minister: One in five council house tenants is on the fiddle
Grant Shapps believes huge numbers of tenants are taking advantage of the hugely subsidised rents and illegally sub-letting the properties.
"Just like the expence fiddling MP's? - Eh?"
written by Inchcock, 27 January 2012
When men go to war, blame their sex drive: Males evolved to be 'aggressive to outsiders', says psychology study!
It emerged through natural selection as a result of competition for mates, territory and status.
Mates: Sex with fellow shoplifters?
Territory: Outside loo?
Status: In the Jobcentre queue?
Link
written by Inchcock, 27 January 2012
Incontinence should not be a taboo, says leading urologist
Is he taking the p___?
written by Inchcock, 27 January 2012
Councils will be handed £5bn to combat obesity!
Andrew Lansley's part in helping his friends and soon to be new owners of the NHS I suppose!
Despite other cutbacks they find money for this???
written by Inchcock, 27 January 2012
It's not too late to save the NHS from the barbarians
"Oh yes it is!"
written by Inchcock, 27 January 2012
A 32-year-old man spent a day with a three-and-a-half inch nail in his head!
Dante Autullo, of Chicago. fired the nail from a gun as he carried out some work in the garage of his home in Orland Park. He thought it had whizzed past his head - but it lodged in his brain.
Photo
written by Inchcock, 27 January 2012
Woman stayed in rental car for a week!
A woman spent seven days in a rental car after driving into pond!
Photo & Report
written by Inchcock, 26 January 2012
Violent Crime increases in the UK
Muggings, bag snatches and the theft of smart-phones were up 12 per cent to just under 600,000.
"Any politicians reading this might be slightly interested?"
written by Inchcock, 25 January 2012
Woman, 85, saves husband by fighting off angry moose with a shovel!
Mrs Taylor (86) ran to the boot of her pick-up truck where she grabbed the shovel to warn off the annoyed animal. Her husband has described his spouse's actions as 'heroic'!
"Amazing woman!"
written by Inchcock, 25 January 2012
Showing page 37 (of 54 pages)