Showing breaking news satire snippets written by Inchcock.
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Showing page 33 (of 54 pages)
NHS reforms: David Cameron says he is 'at one' with Andrew Lansley
"Hello... shades of a Willie Hague affair coming on?"
written by Inchcock, 12 February 2012
Virus-carrying mosquito returns to UK after 67 years
Mosquitos capable of spreading a potentially deadly virus have been found in Britain for the first time since 1945.
"The little varmints!"
written by Inchcock, 12 February 2012
Southwark Council is paying a private company £2.45 a call to answer phone inquiries.
"Can you believe it?"
written by Inchcock, 12 February 2012
Vauxhall £185 million loss - Plant Closure next?
Vauxhall may have to close its plant in Ellesmere Port, Cheshire, where it employs about 2,100.
"Let's pray they don't have to - please!"
written by Inchcock, 12 February 2012
If Argentina had waited a few weeks - they would have captured the Falklands!
Britain would not have been able to reclaim the Falklands in 1982 had Argentina waited a few more months to attack, due to planned cuts to our Navy.
"Will somebody please pass this on to Cameron?"
written by Inchcock, 12 February 2012
David Beckham has revealed he only has three true friends!
Still, he has got his £128million fortune to pal around with!
"Bless him!"
written by Inchcock, 12 February 2012
Frisbee throwers on LA beaches to be hit with £630 fine!
Fines of up to $1,000 (£630) are to be imposed for throwing American Frisbees on Los Angeles beaches to protect sunbathers from flying objects.
"Quiet right, there's too much fun about today!"
written by Inchcock, 11 February 2012
UK to aid Syria rebels
The UK is drawing up plans to send body armour, laptops and satellite phones to Syrian rebels.
"They might consider aiding our own troops in Afghanistan with the same!"
written by Inchcock, 11 February 2012
UK Voting intention Poll - 10th February 2012
Consevativrs 41%
Labour 38%
Lib-Dems 9%
Other 11%
"Amazing! Tories and Lib-Dems up 1% ?!?!"
written by Inchcock, 11 February 2012
John Cleese: "London is no longer an English city."
The comic, 71, said that the mix of cultures had helped the capital win the 2012 Olympics. It can be hard to find an English person, and that the "parent culture has dissipated".
"That's true!"
written by Inchcock, 11 February 2012
Government websites: how much does each one cost?
Find out here:
Gov.com website facts!
written by Inchcock, 11 February 2012
Red Ken: Boris Johnson is just like Hitler!
Claims Ken Livingstone.
"Bit over the top methinks there Ken?"
written by Inchcock, 11 February 2012
Police Station cleaner sacked... for stealing three spoonfuls of coffee
And Baroness Uddin who fiddled £125,000 on expenses was suspended - and she still lives in the subsidised flat she cheated on!
One rule for the rich....!
written by Inchcock, 11 February 2012
Jamie Oliver's next project: Get children growing fruit and veg at school
They found the kids at my local Nottingham school growing marijuana!
written by Inchcock, 11 February 2012
Tory billionaire banker Nat Rothschild loses libel action
Billionaire banker Nathaniel Rothschild lost his libel action yesterday over being portrayed as a "puppet master" in global politics.
"A Rothschild losing? Bet that pissed him off!"
written by Inchcock, 11 February 2012
Elderly told: Go back to work and downsize your home!
Said David Halpern, a senior No.10 aide.
"I live in a two up two down terraced house - surrounded by yobboes, cannot afford to get the roof mended or pay the gas bill.. any further advise David?"
written by Inchcock, 11 February 2012
Mansfield lottery winner: Let's buy a new carpet
Mansfield lottery couple: a £41m win? Let's buy a new carpet.
"Fair enough!"
written by Inchcock, 11 February 2012
UK Immigration is at record levels!
New asylum figures show a rise in applications from Libya and Syria.
So, what are the facts?
Guardian - Immigration Facts
written by Inchcock, 10 February 2012
Are NHS waiting times really improving?
David (I'm a millionaire Etonian') Cameron said: Waiting times are down, infection rates are down.
"I do not believe him!"
written by Inchcock, 10 February 2012
Fabio Capello thanks England fans
Fabio Capello yesterday thanked England fans for supporting him as he left the country with his head held high.
"Good sodding by to him and his rubbish results!"
written by Inchcock, 10 February 2012
Snowmen beheaded for 'damaging the grass'
A story to melt the hardest of hearts. Children in a London park spent hours building the perfect snowman. only for council workers to knock it down in the name of health and safety.
"Swine's!"
written by Inchcock, 10 February 2012
RBS stops pensioner's free lunch!
Pensioners of RBS have become the latest victims of the state-backed lender's push to cut costs after being informed the annual lunch programme for former staff had been cancelled.
"Tight sods"!
written by Inchcock, 10 February 2012
China plans to create 45m jobs in three years!
Bit like Cameron in the UK... but more believable!
written by Inchcock, 10 February 2012
Jobcentre Plus: There are jobs out there!
JCP is taking on average 10,000 vacancies every working day.
"With officially 1.3m unemployed, nearer 2.2m in reality! Take off the part-time, and skilled jobs, what does that leave?"
written by Inchcock, 10 February 2012
Showing page 33 (of 54 pages)
