Showing breaking news satire snippets written by Richard DagNabbit.
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Showing page 29 (of 34 pages)
O'Bama Defends Afghanistan Timetable
Too late - Gates and Clinton have already usurped it.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 26 December 2009
$ 6 Million Dollar Payday for Mortgage Execs
It's a Free for all!
'Tis the season to be jolly fa la la la laaa la la la la.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 26 December 2009
Passenger Ignites Small Device On US Plane
Chertoff requests additional $ 15 Billion to "fight terrorist threats."
Who is that elephant in the bedroom?
written by Richard DagNabbit, 26 December 2009
Gates Proposes $ 2 billion dollar fund for unstable countries
When questioned what he proposes for financially unstable US citizens, he replied "higher taxes".
Who is running this country anyway?
written by Richard DagNabbit, 26 December 2009
US Military Drops Pregnancy Ban
Recruiting for Maternity Ward personnel goes through roof.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 25 December 2009
SMU Rolls in First Bowl Game Since 1984
NCAA launches investigation as to whether boosters recruited more than 40 semi-pro players to play for the team.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 25 December 2009
PGA Tour to Rewrite Personal Code of Ethics
Fearing backlash from Tiger exploits, the PGA Tour is having John Daly and Boris Becker re-write the Tour's Code of Ethics and Standards of Personal Decorum.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 25 December 2009
BNN News Suggests Jesus was Personally Wealthy
He probably had a substantial investment portfolio with Goldman Sachs and when he found out what the account management fees were, he tossed their tables. That turned out to be a very bad move.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 25 December 2009
Pelosi Tells Newsweek She Doens't Care if Citizens Don't Like Her
Spoken like someone who believes she is untouchable and probably is.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 25 December 2009
Dizzy Madoff Treated for Hypertension
Apparently his gold neck chain weighed so much it was strangling him.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 25 December 2009
Who exactly is running the US?
Well, it surely isn't O'Bama
written by Richard DagNabbit, 25 December 2009
Lawmaker Targets Loud TV ADS
Exempts Political Campaign Ads in the legislation.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 25 December 2009
Stockton, CA Reaps Results of Gun Control Efforts
Now Cambodian gangs rule the streets of Stockton, kidnapping and whacking off fingers and ears of their victims. They send the body parts to the families of their victims to get ransom $$.
Doh!
written by Richard DagNabbit, 25 December 2009
Gates and Clinton Tell Truth for a Change!
When asked what the real problem is exactly, they both chimed in unison "there are still some that won't play our usury games."
Yep. that really does say it all.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 25 December 2009
Woman Jumps Pope - Scores TKO
The woman, after scoring the TKO, was informed that her punishment would be 20 years of forced living in the U.S.
She has started an appeal to St. Lucifer claiming cruel and unusual punishment.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 24 December 2009
O'Bama: End of Struggle Near on Healthcare Battle
Prez O'Bama stated that the nearly 100 year old battle on how the US would reform Healthcare is almost over. Insurance companies will now be allowed to make more profit for providing less services.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 24 December 2009
Nancy Pelosi Changes Mind: Face Transplant Instead of Face Lift
Nancy Pelosi announced that the Health Bill wars have taken a toll and its time for a full face transplant. "A simple lift won't do it" said Pelosi, "I would end up looking like a stretched prune."
written by Richard DagNabbit, 24 December 2009
Favre - Childress Dispute Resolved!!
Childress will sit and Favre will play AND coach.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 24 December 2009
Christina Aguilera Has Fender Bender; Body Menders Line Up to Submit Offers To Repair
Christan Aguilera is reporting having been in a fender bender. Apparently her derriere suffered a dent on her left butt cheek. Body and paint experts are lining up to do the repair work.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 24 December 2009
US Senate Passes Helath Care Bill!
The 1,250+ page bills outlines the plan to deny all US citizens any health insurance by 2012. It does of course, provide excellent insurance for elected representatives and the military.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 24 December 2009
US Congress Raises Debt Ceiling to 12.4 Trillion Dollars
Once again, those funny politician found some fool chumps to buy US debt!
written by Richard DagNabbit, 24 December 2009
Madoff Sent for Medical Help
The imprisoned Madoff was sent to the infirmary for medical assistance today. The Doctor later reported that his wallet had been lifted while signing an investment plan developed by Madoff. Doh!
written by Richard DagNabbit, 24 December 2009
Spanish Police Sieze Ship with $ 600M of Cocaine
Later in the day it was reported on the street of Seville and Barcelona that undercover cops were dropping the street price immediately on cocaine.
written by Richard DagNabbit, 24 December 2009
Schwartznigger Gives O'Bama an "A" for Effort?
Isn't this like giving Madoff an "A" for "trying"?
written by Richard DagNabbit, 21 December 2009
Showing page 29 (of 34 pages)
