Showing breaking news satire snippets written by Inchcock.
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Showing page 20 (of 54 pages)
Ministers see off 'pasty' rebels
The government defeated an attempt by MPs to overturn changes to VAT charged on takeaway food, dubbed "the pasty tax".
"See, told you they would!"
written by Inchcock, 19 April 2012
Greens launch local 2012 election push
Deputy Green Party leader Adrian Ramsay promises to reduce the gap between rich and poor and create jobs in environmentally-friendly industries.
"Yes... we know!"
written by Inchcock, 19 April 2012
Nick Clegg says Lib Dems are 'delivering'!
Nick Clegg launches the Liberal Democrats' English local elections campaign, but admits the polls will be "tough" for his party.
"I could have told him that!"
written by Inchcock, 19 April 2012
Respect targets Bradford council!
The Respect Party says it will have candidates in every ward at Bradford's local council elections following George Galloway's by-election win.
"Fancy that now!"
written by Inchcock, 19 April 2012
Miliband launches Labour's local poll campaign
Ed Miliband pledges to govern for the whole country "not just the wealthy few" as he launches Labour's campaign for next month's English local elections.
"Ed Miliband?... who's he then?"
written by Inchcock, 19 April 2012
£1m EuroMillions winner in Nottingham yet to claim prize
The lottery company said the winning ticket was bought in Nottingham on 23 March. This comes after three Notts couples won lottery jackpots in just over three months.
"Oh I am glad for them!"
written by Inchcock, 19 April 2012
Dutch bug cookbook launched to stir taste for insects!
"Insect Cookbook", the move towards the introduction of insects on restaurant menus in the Netherlands.
"Caramelized locust, meat pie sprinkled with worms, Cockroach grill etc, all full of protein!"
written by Inchcock, 18 April 2012
Newt was nipped on the finger by a penguin at Zoo!
"No doubt making many people jealous?"
Reuters - Newt Gingrich
written by Inchcock, 18 April 2012
Labour has its biggest lead over Tories in polls since general election!
Due no doubt to the 'pasty taxes' and 'granny taxes' since the budget last month?
written by Inchcock, 18 April 2012
18/04/12 HMG: Petrol Prices to reach £1.60 a litre
"Just thought I'd cheer you up!"
written by Inchcock, 17 April 2012
Man Shoots Nail Into His Heart - And Survives
Dennis Hennis, 52, was trying to clear a jammed nail gun when he fired it into his chest, puncturing the right side of his heart.
He said he felt like he'd won the lottery!
"Good for him!"
written by Inchcock, 17 April 2012
Nude maid service raising eyebrows in Texas city
Police in this staunchly conservative West Texas city are keeping close tabs on a young entrepreneur's recently opened cleaning service that offers nude maids!
"Bet their keeping a close eye on em!"
written by Inchcock, 17 April 2012
NC town's police chief can't shoot, loses gun and badge
Police Chief Thomas Bennett was suspended as a law enforcement officer after failing his recent annual firearms qualification exam.
"Bit worrying that!"
written by Inchcock, 17 April 2012
Alabama judge orders man to jail for wearing sagging pants
A man has been given a three-day jail sentence for contempt of court for wearing so-called saggy pants. The judge told Ramsey to buy pants that fit or a belt when he gets out of jail!
"Bit keen that?"
written by Inchcock, 17 April 2012
Proven: Only female mosquitoes bite people!
Only female mosquitoes bite people and feed on blood for egg production.
"I'm not surprised at all!"
written by Inchcock, 17 April 2012
6 puppies, mother dog abandoned in Ohio suitcase!
A man who tried to abandon 6 puppies by zipping them inside a suitcase and leaving it outside an Ohio business was charged after it was found he'd left his contact information attached.
"The git!"
written by Inchcock, 17 April 2012
French police seize 13 tons of tiny Eiffel Towers
Police say they've seized around 13 tons of mini Eiffel Towers. They say a Paris souvenir shop owner, husband & son also were arrested accused of selling the towers without a permit.
"Another violent crime prevented!"
written by Inchcock, 17 April 2012
Vt. governor chased by 4 bears in backyard
Vermont Gov. Peter Shumlin says he was chased and nearly caught by four bears that were raiding his birdfeeders.
"The bear-faced cheek!"
written by Inchcock, 17 April 2012
Burglar arrested in shower after champagne & meal
Police say a naked burglar has been arrested while taking a shower after he sipped champagne and ate a meal in a California family's home, while robbing it!
"Cheeky monkey!"
written by Inchcock, 17 April 2012
Vietnamese businessman Pham Dinh Nguyen buys American town!
He paid $900,000 for Buford, Wyoming - population 1.
Buford has a gas station and store, a 1905 schoolhouse, a cabin, a garage and a 3-bedroom house.
"What next? The White House?"
written by Inchcock, 16 April 2012
Test result: Squirrels forget where they hide about half of their nuts.
How did they test for that then?
written by Inchcock, 16 April 2012
Runaway Cow Gets Hollywood Movie Deal
Yvonne the German dairy cow, escaped and lived in the wild for 30 days, avoiding being slaughtered!
Is to have a film made of her escapade!
"Holy Cow!"
written by Inchcock, 16 April 2012
Madonna dares to bare.... her shapely, toned legs
"Damn, I missed that!"
Here she is!
written by Inchcock, 16 April 2012
War Hero: Bullet found in leg after 40 years!
Looking back, Robert, 63, believes he must have been shot by a rogue bullet without realising it during a daring raid in Vietnam when he was just 22.
"Blimey!"
written by Inchcock, 16 April 2012
Showing page 20 (of 54 pages)
