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Germany seeks extradiction of alleged spy
Germany has requested that Croatia extradict an alleged spy. President Obama, who failed to have China extradict NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden, said, "Good luck with that."
written by Gee Pee, 27 June 2013
Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes replaced
Criticized for replacing the late, if not so great, Lisa ("Left Eye") Lopes with a Japanese singer, TLC bandmates said, "We had to. That bitch be dead."
written by Gee Pee, 27 June 2013
FDA out to kill you
The FDA allows a toxic and corrosive chemical in soft drinks that Europeans have banned as a health hazard. "Americans," the FDA said, "even the women, are more manly than Europeans."
written by Gee Pee, 27 June 2013
Holly Willoughby bares boobs on national TV
Holly Willoughby bared her boobs on the BBC. Effeminate British blokes were not impressed; her display prompted 139 complaints. Nevertheless, Holly remains unrepentant: "I wear what I like," she says.
written by Gee Pee, 27 June 2013
San Francisco (mostly) bans public nudity
San Francisco has outlawed public nudity except by participants in Gay Pride events, declaring homosexuals "an endangered species," which is protected, as such, from the law's enforcement.
written by Gee Pee, 27 June 2013
Michelle Obama a "huge Hemingway fan"
During the Obama family's African safari, while the president hunts lions, the First Lady will read Ernest Hemingway's "The Short Happy Life of Francis Macomber" and Other Short Stories.
written by Gee Pee, 27 June 2013
Sharon Osbourne fancies Prince Charles
Told that Sharon Osbourne would have anal sex with him in exchange for a royal title, Prince Charles quipped, "'Pain in the Ass' comes to mind." (Ozzie said he'd "do the prince" for free.)
written by Gee Pee, 27 June 2013
CDC: American men big on anal sex
According to a study by the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), 40% of American men between the ages of 15 and 44 have had heterosexual anal sex, and the remaining 60% have had homosexual anal sex.
written by Gee Pee, 27 June 2013
"Crossfire" returns to CNN
Communist Network News (CNN) is bringing its once-popular Crossfire political talk show back. This time, the host and his guests will be armed with loaded revolvers. The first guest? Newt Gingrich.
written by Gee Pee, 27 June 2013
Sen. Pelosi told to take a hike
Sen. Nancy Pelosi was banned from a San Francisco nude beach. "We have our standards," lifeguards said.
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Naked man arrested
A naked Oregon man who raped his wife and killed a lamb was arrested for cruelty to animals. "In Oregon, we don't take lightly to animal abuse," police said.
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Google supports gay rights
In support of the Supreme Court's rulings on DOMA and Proposition 8, Google has instiututed a new policy: only gays can now use the company's search engine. Its new motto decrees, "Be gay or go away!"
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Heidi Klum has tattoo removed
Has-been model Heidi Klum is having a tattoo removed from her right arm. "The rest of my body is completely covered in ink," she said, "from head to toe; I need space for my latest man's name."
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Scotty Pippin due in court, rather than on court
Former NBA star Scotty Pippin, arrested for assault, said he looks forward to his day in court. "My case is a slam dunk," he predicted. The prosecutor agrees: "For us, it is."
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Man rips off penis
A Columbus, OH, idiot ripped off a penis after ingesting "magic mushrooms." The adult bookstore from which he stole the dildo won't press charges. "He needs it worse than we do," the owner said.
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Obama reacts to DOMA ruling
President Obama reacted to the Supreme Court's ruling against the Defense of Marriage Act's constitutionality by announcing his plans to divorce the First Lady and marry former senator Barney Frank.
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Congress reacts to US Supreme Court ruling on DOMA
In response to the Supreme Court's ruling that the Defense of Marriage Act is unconstitutional, lawmakers may outlaw gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and transgender persons of "either or both sexes."
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Hidden cam catches man masturbating
A hidden camera caught Ostersund resident Per Edstrom masturbating after he had mounted his bicycle. "What's the big deal?" he demanded when arrested. "I was just going for a joy ride!"
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Radford grads: "school's diplomas are not worth the paper they're printed on"
Radford University handed its graduates diplomas laden with misspelled words and other "typos," angering students. The school promised "wee wont make no moor Miss Takes in thee future."
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
DOMA ruled unconstitutional
The US Supreme Court has ruled: the Defense of Marriage Act is "unconstitutional." Even as Congress prepares to amend the Constitution to outlaw the Court, Las Vegas plans for more same-sex weddings.
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Matt Lauer badgers Paula Deen
To generate ratings for his NBC freak show, Today, Matt ("The Rat") Lauer badgered Paula Deen until she cried, as Ann Curry did when he had her fired. Next up: John Boehner, who "cries well."
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Monica Lewinsky auctions infamous blue dress
Monica Lewinsky is auctioning the dress she wore as an intern while servicing former President Bill Clinton in the Oval Orifice. Bidding on the "slightly stained" dress starts at $25 million.
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Winkler apologizes for being a racist
Ryan Winkler (D-MN) apologized for being a racist after calling Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas "an Uncle Tom." Actor Henry Winkler may sue the representative for defaming the Winkler name.
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Kate Gosselin: "I am not a racist"
Kate Gosselin defended herself against racism after slanting her eyes in a Twitter photo, as if she were mocking Asians: "Some of my best friends are chinks and Japs!"
written by Gee Pee, 26 June 2013
Showing page 12 (of 15 pages)
