Showing breaking news satire snippets written by Inchcock.
Show all snippets.
Showing page 12 (of 54 pages)
Singles try to sniff out love at pheromone parties!
Guests are asked to submit a slept-in T-shirt that will be smelled by other participants.
Then, voila! You can pick your partner based on scent, of so the theory goes.
"Will it's different!"
written by Inchcock, 02 July 2012
2 women in their 80s parachute for Ohio charity!
83-year-old Marjorie Bryan and 82-year-old Marianna Sherman have parachuted from a plane to raise money for a veterans' food pantry in northwest Ohio.
"Marjorie and Marianna... magnificent!"
written by Inchcock, 02 July 2012
Police on the trail of snail poachers
They have now called in the police as the snails are a protected species sold illegally as a delicacy to French restaurants, which fry them in garlic butter as l'escargot!
"Easy targets for the thieves!"
written by Inchcock, 01 July 2012
Thieves in New York City have started a new sneaker trend!
One Bronx sneaker store says the thieves do their research. They know before they steal a left shoe which store has a right shoe of the same size and style on display.
"The ingenuity of crooks!"
written by Inchcock, 01 July 2012
Party held for Thai-born panda's 3rd birthday!
I was alone for my 64th birthday - then again there are millions of unemployed made redundant, heart failure suffering, deaf, partially sighted, impecunious, lonely old sods about!
"Depressed? Me?"
written by Inchcock, 30 June 2012
Texas woman gets $1.4M utility bill in error!
Kristin Harriger's bill was nearly $1.4 million. The Abilene, Texas, woman immediately called her provider, Potentia Energy. She quickly learned that her bill was an error.
"Bet she was glad of that!"
written by Inchcock, 30 June 2012
Man robs bank, drives to police station, confesses!
Raymond Carl Knudson pleaded guilty Monday to sticking up a Bank of America branch in April, a crime he confessed within minutes of committing the crime.
"Obviously not a politician then!"
written by Inchcock, 30 June 2012
Police: 5 suspected of stealing 9.5 tons of garlic
Austrian police did not need sniffer dogs to locate this suspected heist - 9.5 tons of garlic. The Romanian nationals - were not named, in line with Austrian privacy laws.
written by Inchcock, 30 June 2012
Sun Poll: Shoppers can't remember their last UK-made purchase
Apart from food, I can't remember my last purchase at all!
I know Harold Wilson was in power at the time!
written by Inchcock, 29 June 2012
Man uses slingshot to fire marbles at speed camera
50-year-old Bruce Lawrence May of Ellicott City was arrested and charged with assault for using a slingshot to fire glass marbles at a speed camera van.
"Lost his marbles when caught speeding?"
written by Inchcock, 29 June 2012
Doctors urged GPs to ditch pensions strike
David Cameron insists reform would still leave GPs with pensions most private sector workers 'can only dream of'.
"A bit like his pension then?"
written by Inchcock, 29 June 2012
MP's want free hot-meals!
After complaining of mice and 'weird' menus in the Commons.
"Some pensioners, unemployed, and sick citizens can't afford hot meals at all!"
written by Inchcock, 29 June 2012
Cameron's Benefit Blitz!
Youngsters will be forced to live with their parents!
"What in prison, squats, or fire-bombed police stations?"
written by Inchcock, 29 June 2012
Beans on toast is UK's 4th favourite home-meal
Well, amongst the made-redundant benefit claimants, pensioners and Big Issue sellers anyway!
written by Inchcock, 28 June 2012
24.06.12: UK Voting Intentions
Labour 41%
Conservative 33%
UKIP 9%
Lib Dem 8%
Others 8%
"Comments welcomed from Nick Clegg?"
written by Inchcock, 28 June 2012
BT claim there are over 52,000 public payphones
BT claim there are over 52,000 public payphones in throughout the UK.
"Well I know of two that have not been vandalised!"
written by Inchcock, 27 June 2012
Nottingham Lib-Dem supporters poll results released
Asked whether they thought the Lib-Dems had done right in joining the Conservatives in the Coalition Government - neither of the supporters chose to reply!
written by Inchcock, 26 June 2012
Bandits foiled by glued-up bills!
Three bandits were foiled in London, their attempt to pry open a stolen cash box was foiled by a new security system that slathered the bills with glue.
"Gives a new meaning to 'Sticky-fingers!"
written by Inchcock, 26 June 2012
The Shame of the jobless!
Only a quarter are happy to talk about their hunt for a job, a survey by ads website Gumtree.com says.
"Well who want to spout on about their failures!"
written by Inchcock, 26 June 2012
Giant dinosaurs warmed the planet with their flatulence, claim researchers.
They suggest the gas could have been a key factor in the warm climate 150 million years ago.
"Load of crap I say!"
written by Inchcock, 26 June 2012
Oregon workers awarded $332K in onsite toilet fight!
Two workers who claimed they were forced to urinate in a bucket have been awarded $332,000. they were fired for complaining about the lack of an onsite toilets.
"Oh!"
written by Inchcock, 26 June 2012
Steven Gerrard: I'll never give up my dream of success with England!
Along with a few million unemployed dreaming of getting a job in England?
written by Inchcock, 25 June 2012
Huge Shark Caught Off Cornwall
Two fishermen have reeled in what is believed to be the largest shark caught in British waters...
It is uncertain whether it was George Osborne or not at this stage!
written by Inchcock, 25 June 2012
Showing page 12 (of 54 pages)
