Hard, no-nonsense football manager Alex Ferguson is reported to be in negotiations with the manufacturers of Wrigley's chewing gum to land a major six-figure endorsement deal.
Sir Alex Ferguson has raided the Ugandan Premier League to sign striker Meatand Twoveg. The Idi Amin lookalike flew into Old Trafford this morning and after a quick physical put his cross on the dotted line.
Sir Alex Ferguson proudly unveiled the biggest transfer sensation in footballing history, when he announced the signing of Klingon, Pach Kaypach.
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