Discussion Forum

"Two elderly locals sat behind us at the county cricket ground:

'You played any cricket then, Bert?'

'No. My eyesight was never good enough. Done a bit of umpiring though.'"

Priceless.

I bet that was the myopic old bastard that gave me out to one that went on with the arm when I was 99 not out playing for Old Componians against a crack side of ex Pakistani test players representing a Met Police 11.

I swear to God that ball pitched at least a foot outside leg stump and wouldn't even have hit a second set of timbers! *seethe*

I saw that innings, Dants, and how you survived three obvious catches and two plum LBs is beyond me! And every one of that 99 was a streaky edge or byes!

watching Clives comp-winning cricket innings have given me hours - or was it minutes - of enjoyment. i particularly liked the commentary during his aforementioned 99 >>>

'The bowlings Holding - the batsmens Danton' <<<<

And rumour has it that wasn't the first time...

Oh yes..

I always suspected Maggot was an Eastend Public Schoolboy

Massive cricket fan.

http://www.cricket-game.co.uk/cricket-sledging.htm

Some of the best sledging ever heard.

My particular favourite is Eddo Brandes' response to Glenn McGrath.

Eddo Brandes..

I didn't know that one, Simon..

Ta..

Fookin brilliant..

There appears to be far too much shouting in this thread for my taste.

Have you people no respect for, or deference to, our beloved summer game?

By The Lord Harry himself, if I wasnt so damn butch I'd fold like a blasted girlie!

Simon - I'd heard the biscuit one and it is a belter but my favourite is No 7. Rod Marsh was it? To refuse the batsman a runner on the grounds that he's a fat unfit cunt is not only funny as fuck but quintessentially Australian

Strewth! Fair go mate!.....etc.

The Aussies are pretty useful when it comes to sledging.

I love all the examples on that link.

I'm a big footy fan as well, but footballers are not exactly a cerebral bunch. Witty abuse is not really in their forte.

I'll see if I can find some more. I'm currently en route to me parents house in the Borders on a bus. Just left Edinburgh so I've got 3 hours to fill.

On the plus side, it's me old mans birthday and that means plenty of red wine. It's good for your heart unno.

This thread is very loud and very posh. Me wot is a lower working class middle class working class bloke finds it very ard to unerstan wot it is you is gawpin abart. So, can someone hexplain wot it is all abart?


Cheers!

Arm xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx