Discussion Forum

What do you do to achieve your goals in your life.

He shoots, he scores!

Goooooooaaaaaaaaaaallllllllll!!!!!!

[lifts shirt over head and races around like an aeroplane]

Oh...not that kind of goal?

Iain

Iain Just say no

Well Richard, I supposed if we haven't any plans then you have arrived to give us LOTS of advice. How much do you charge?

LG

I should have listened to Mark and just said 'No!'

Chelsea 17-Arsenal 0



Arm xxxxx

I read all the up to date goat magazines, and ask for advice from the top goat breeders.

Sorry, I thought you said "achieve goats in your life".

Thinking of buying a goat....hey...milk...cheese...and a lawn mower all in one animal....

Hang on! Just thought...my husband does the shopping, buys the milk and cheese and mows the lawn. Why change things now?

So, all this time I could just get a goat and not worry with the whole getting married thing?

Who needs a husband when you can have goat husbandry?

Hah!

You know nothing of the wiles of the goat!

Paddy McGinty.

Football would be funnier if they replaced the word "goal" with the word "goat". League positions might be decided on goat difference. The goatkeeper would be the last line of defence. Everybody would be looking for a goatscorer. Did Geoff Hurst's shot really cross the goatline? Who can forget swarthy Maradona's infamous "Hand of God" goat?

I agree, it would be funnier! I'm just excited that I can just get a goat instead of some guy who can never remember to put the toilet seat down!

Just be careful of goat rustlers. They're annoying. They'll really get your goat.

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Quote: Erskin Quint

Football would be funnier if they replaced the word "goal" with the word "goat". League positions might be decided on goat difference. The goatkeeper would be the last line of defence.

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Something similar to this was tried in the English league during 1942 when all footballing terms were replaced with the names of weapons in order to focus the population on the war effort. Thus a penalty became a 'Light tank, (infantry)' and a throw-in became a 'Bouton-Paul defiant light attack aircraft'. Stalin heard about the scheme and took it one stage further, replacing footballing terms with patriotic slogans; thus in Russia, the official term for off-side was 'Our glorious Red Army crushes the Nazi oppressors', and indirect free-kick became 'Womenfolk of Russia, work for your menfolk's freedom.'

It all started to fall out of favour around 1962, but you can still sometimes hear the cries of 'Our Motherland marches for a new future' from the terraces at Minsk whenever someone is sent off.

But then, that's Minsk for you.