Discussion Forum

Skoob suggested it, and I think it would be a fitting tribute to the old boy.

What do you reckon peeps?

Oh, by the way CJ, A copy of the nude avitar photo is on it's way as requested.

Lots of love hugs and kisses to you all.

Armfeetandtoe.

I've had on the go for a while an article about the Colonel since he granted me an interview in his Spanish Colonial Hacienda-style home in the western suburbs. I think I ought to finish it.

Certainly a tribute to the old bugger would be good and I can imagine his ear reddening at the mere mention of it maybe each of us should write our reminiscences?

Alternatively we could pass around the hat to send his unfortunate daughter and her infected twins for treatment?

I do know now he is getting older and Mrs. Juan more and more infirm by the day that the gesture of a Philippina maid would not go unthanked.

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Quote: Lynton

I've had on the go for a while an article about the Colonel since he granted me an interview in his Spanish Colonial Hacienda-style home in the western suburbs. I think I ought to finish it.

Certainly a tribute to the old bugger would be good and I can imagine his ear reddening at the mere mention of it maybe each of us should write our reminiscences?

Alternatively we could pass around the hat to send his unfortunate daughter and her infected twins for treatment?

I do know now he is getting older and Mrs. Juan more and more infirm by the
day that the gesture of a Philippina maid would not go unthanked.

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....I think a presentaion of a nose hair trimmer is in order....Lady Godiva
suggested it earlier on another thread....

I think the guy from Scotland should do the interview......

Message from Juanita Juan..


Hello Uncle Lynton and Uncle Arm. And Uncle Morse...

He's got another fuckin' hangover..

Plus the illegitimate HIV twins won't stop bawling..

And I need a needle of crack fast..

If you could see your way to cheering us up this weekend..

Anything..

Plug the holes in the portacabin roof..

Send a frozen chicken..

Adopt me..

A couple of quid..

Anything..


Love Juanita

Dear Juanita

Sorry to hear you need cheering up. Isn't it maddening how insistent a child's cries can be. I think there is some silicone caulking left from when I came round to mend the bath after CJ messed it up by dissolving that dissident fellow in it. You might try using that to shut them up and give yourself a minute's peace. Remind the Colonel too that rather than acid, if he could use caustic soda next time he'd have less problems and it would scour the drains too. I left a tub of vinegar in the garage to handle the bones it might take longe but it is more environmetally friendly.


As I'm sure you'll remember when I was round last time and bouncing you on my knee (I know, but even if you are now nearly a woman I could see it still gives you a lot of pleasure)what I explained to you. I wouldn't matter if you did cover up the needle marks with foundation cream and remebemr to wipe the powder off your nose regularly. The problem would still be that no manufacturer has yet come up with the necessary latex sheath more than 2mm thick and anyway think of the age difference. No it just cannot be, not even through legal adoption. and I don't think writing to a manufacturer of tyre inner tubes would be very fruitful.


Hugs

Uncle Lynton

Dear Juanita,

You must understand, that Colonel Juan has a large lump of shrapnel lodged in his cranium.

The voices in his head are BBC radio 2 and 4 being broadcast from his brain and thats what makes him talk to himself and start dancing in the middle of the night.

The hole in the portacabin roof is there to release the pressure on his swonickles and placing a frozen chicken on his pillow will not take the swelling away.

However, Uncle Arm is a generous man, and has forwarded you a copy of the radio times and a £5 note to buy some chicken dippers from McDonalds.

Keep daddy warm and call the police.


Lots of love and kisses

Uncle ARM XXX