Discussion Forum

I hear that these are being eliminated on signs in Great Britain.

Was this an election issue or an economic restraint measure?

I believe Spectrum has been stockpiling them for just such an occurence.

Shhh! Verbotten...

But kinda funny too.

...if you've only got a semi colon, it bound to turn into an ass mess eventually!


people that don't use them have been proven to be comma tose.

Yes, former, Spoof writer Spectrum, was fond of using, commas and often used, apostrophe's.

I don't like the comma that lives inside the speech marks. I try to avoid putting it in.

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Quote: Erskin Quint

Yes, former, Spoof writer Spectrum, was fond of using, commas and often used, apostrophe's.

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...and here I thought he was a kinda run on sentence type of guy,

I've heard in the Last Days there will come a great Apostrophe.

Yes, one way to deal with writer's block I suppose, just add punctuation to fill things our a bit after drumming up a scurrilous headline.

Wheat and chaff served in equal measure.

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Quote: Erskin Quint

Yes, former, Spoof writer Spectrum, was fond of using, commas and often used, apostrophe's.

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And a great possessive shall come upon the world.

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Quote: Amethyst Ryder

I've heard in the Last Days there will come a great Apostrophe.

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Quote: victor nicholas

And a great possessive shall come upon the world.

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And participles shall be dangled without clause.

My head hurts.

Regards

Skoob

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Quote: Skoob1999

My head hurts.

Regards

Skoob

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....how's your hyphen...mended yet?

Still in inverted commas Cap.

Thanks for asking.

Regards

Skoob.

An excerpt from R.F. Laird's The Boomer Bible:

CHAPTER 45

1 And even though there was absolutely no chance that they could ever live up to Shakespeare,
2 The Brits also tolerated attempts at literature by writers from their most benighted provinces,
3 Such as Ireland, Scotland, and America,
4 Even though most of the writers from these places didn't really like English,
5 And kept trying to turn it into something else,
6 Like Robert Burns, a Scot who owned a stinking apostrophe factory in Glasgow and thought English would be better if it had several apostrophes in each word,
7 And George Bernard Shaw, an Irishman who thought English would be better if the right spellings for words could be decided by five hundred drunken Irishmen in a pub,
8 And James Joyce, an Irishman who thought he'd like English better if he turned it into a language that nobody could understand,
9 Unless their name was James Joyce,
10 And William Butler Yeats, an Irishman who thought English would be better if it kind of seemed to make sense,
11 Until you read it more carefully,
12 And T.S. Eliot, an American who thought that English would be better if it contained so many depressing foreign-language references that no American would ever be able to figure them out,
13 Unless that American had the exquisite taste to move to Britain,
14 And spend the rest of his life looking up neat foreign language references in dusty Brit libraries,
15 Under the shadow of Shakespeare.

Has he gone yet?

Must have had a bad day...

Regards

Skoob

(In pain but smiling.)

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Quote: The San Francisco Onion

An excerpt from R.F. Laird's The Boomer Bible:

CHAPTER 45

1 And even though there was absolutely no chance that they could ever live up to Shakespeare,
2 The Brits also tolerated attempts at literature by writers from their most benighted provinces,
3 Such as Ireland, Scotland, and America,
4 Even though most of the writers from these places didn't really like English,
5 And kept trying to turn it into something else,
6 Like Robert Burns, a Scot who owned a stinking apostrophe factory in Glasgow and thought English would be better if it had several apostrophes in each word,
7 And George Bernard Shaw, an Irishman who thought English would be better if the right spellings for words could be decided by five hundred drunken Irishmen in a pub,
8 And James Joyce, an Irishman who thought he'd like English better if he turned it into a language that nobody could understand,
9 Unless their name was James Joyce,
10 And William Butler Yeats, an Irishman who thought English would be better if it kind of seemed to make sense,
11 Until you read it more carefully,
12 And T.S. Eliot, an American who thought that English would be better if it contained so many depressing foreign-language references that no American would ever be able to figure them out,
13 Unless that American had the exquisite taste to move to Britain,
14 And spend the rest of his life looking up neat foreign language references in dusty Brit libraries,
15 Under the shadow of Shakespeare.

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That's great, like that.

Here you go, Skoob:

2 oz (or more) vodka
5 oz tomato juice
2 dashes hot sauce
2 dashes Worcestershire sauce
1/2 oz lemon juice
1 pinch salt
1 pinch pepper
1 stalk celery


Add vodka, tomato juice, red hot sauce, green hot sauce, worchester sauce, lemon juice, pinch of salt, pinch of pepper.
Pour back and forth between two mixing glasses.
Strain into an ice-filled highball glass.
Garnish with celery stalk.
Enjoy with a basket of fish 'n' chips.
Feel better.

BTW, I am not actually a doctor.

I had soup in a basket once.

All over the table it was.

It wasn't fish 'n' chips soup, was it?

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Quote: Skoob1999

Has he gone yet?

Must have had a bad day...

Regards

Skoob

(In pain but smiling.)

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....just a passing cloud...carry on.

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Quote: The San Francisco Onion


7 And George Bernard Shaw, an Irishman who thought English would be better if the right spellings for words could be decided by five hundred drunken Irishmen in a pub,
8 And James Joyce, an Irishman who thought he'd like English better if he turned it into a language that nobody could understand,
9 Unless their name was James Joyce,





Just while we are on the subject of Joyce I'll give you a terrifying look into the future.

Our Presidential elections are coming up shortly and we have the usual nominations put forward such as the gangster ex Taoiseach Bertie Ahern and a few others. Now the thought of Bertie swanning round the world again is scary enough but just wait till you see what the Irish public will unleash on the world stage given half a chance.


Senator David Norris, one of the worlds foremost Joycean
scholars.

He's an independent Senator with no party ties, Protestant, gay as a daffodil and mad as a bag of rats. If he gets the gig 'Camp David' will have a completely different meaning after he meets Obama.

Senator David Norris.

It'll probably happen, we sent a foul mouthed childrens puppet called 'Dustin the Turkey' to the Eurovision song contest, funnily enough the Turkey also ran for President and received a fair amount of the ballot on spoiled votes.


Be afraid.

This Norris fellow has a more colourful profile than most writers on this site.

Wait till you see him in action Vic.


Pure comedy, he gets my vote, the world really will be a stage.