Discussion Forum

Male, youthful looking,1,763 yrs seeks F with GSOH and tolerance for bleeding on a nightly basis. Dracula: box 654763

Female youthful looking seeks male GSOH with tolerance for bleeding on monthly basis

Wanted: Male lumberjack who'll let me play with his tool. Men without parental issues only, as my folks tend to hack me off. Lizzie Borden.


By the way, what does GSOH stand for?

J-Man

Good Sense Of Humour.

Regards

Skoob.

Thanks Skoob,

I thought that the Lizzie Borden reference might not be familiar to you Brits.

J-Man,

Heard of Lizzie Borden.

'Lizzie Borden took an axe

Gave her father forty whacks

And she saw what she had done

She gave her mother forty one.'

Or similar.

Quite well known over here.

Regards

Skoob.

Returning to the question, NO

Back to the subject of the thread:

SWM seeks delicious females for romance and dinner. Must go well with Chianti and Fava Beans. Hannibal Lector

Bin Laden searching for cave woman, must wear Burqa and nothing else!

SWM seeks indestructable woman who can endure ejaculations that leave penis at speed of sound and possibly getting nipples bitten off during moments of sex when I lose control. Lead-lined bras and panties will add to the intrigue. Must expect regular kidnapping from super-villians. Contact via Clark Kent at The Daily Planet. Superman

---

Quote: Jaggedone

Bin Laden searching for cave woman, must wear Burqa and nothing else!

---

Response:

My name is Jane, I am an older woman. My first husband Tarzan ran off with an ape. What's a Burque?

oops...had a few, but they got mis posted on the christmas list!

Geez!

ok, here we go again...

Recyled from 1995 When I had a Construction Company and kept the guys entertained.

Advertising Key:
A- Abused E-Estranged MC- Master Carpenter
FC-Finish Carpenter N-Naive CA-Carpenter Apprentice
M-Married W-White F-Framer IA-Illegal Alien
DV-Deviate

AWFC, 44, Enjoys long sojourns through Home Depot, heavy into planers and joiners, gets off on smooth edges and tight joints, T&G my specialty. Need understanding woman 25-35 with own house that needs interior work. Will Complete for Additional negotiated punishment.

MWM: 38, rough and ready, looking for relief from marriage boredom. Tired of reading Penhouse letters in Porti Johns on job. Need like minded woman that can deal with my moods and needs, appearance not important, facial hair o.k., no air heads, I already own compressor.

IA 62, Jack of all trades, seeking recently divorced carpenter's wife who got the unfinished house. Will work for room, board, and beer, prefer Stella or Corona. No 1099's PLEASE! Discreet , mature, professional. Confidentiality assured. Marriage considered if leads to citizenship. Leave message on Spoof c/o Fergus.

DVCM, 38, prefer remodeling your kitchen; let me get into your drawers and you'll thank me forever. Fast worker, reasonable prices. Like night work. Phone sex o.k. to start. NO COLLECT CALLS! Try me on counter tops...none better or more organized in clutteredd workspace. Privacy assured; you wear blindfold.

I could go on, but I don't need all these calls coming in anymore....

Morse

Intelligent SWM Looking for Miss Right. Must like being smacked around once in awhile just for kicks. Also must like to pick up dog crap (mine and others). Good cook a plus!
If interested write Box A7386 Springfield, Il

SWM seeks SWF of substance with a view to marriage, investment in non-profit charitable trusts, lining my pockets and occasional ER visits. Brandy lover okay, but would prefer beer and wine connoisseur. Long walks good. Mascara debateable. Reply Dinkydeano Box236 Springfield IL.

Bi-male Looking for Str8 women, or TS who appreciates a man with fetishes. Must be a Oriental and a BBW. Must enjoy diaper changing and love small animals. Contact TC Box XTC-5634 San Francisco, CA

SWM seeks SWF aged between 25 and 27, don't mind slight disability but must not be a gold-digger. Preference given to those who have not heard of the Beatles. No Gold Diggers! Please supply photo, so I can see if you look like a gold digger.

---

Quote: Bargis Tryhol

Bi-male Looking for Str8 women, or TS who appreciates a man with fetishes. Must be a Oriental and a BBW. Must enjoy diaper changing and love small animals. Contact TC Box XTC-5634 San Francisco, CA

---

....this one will be hard to ferret out of where's he's been hiding....

I should be working hard.

I should be working hard.

I should be working hard.

I did upload a joke and a couple of snippets...

Double transplant survivor looking for love, has heart of a saint, and liver of a postman. Biggest love: immunosuppressants, biggest fear: rejection


To the handsome guy I woke up next to this morning, thanks for stopping in the street to revive me. I feel loads better now.


32yo divorced comedian's wife wltm m with NSOH. And big cock.


Good intentions.

Good intentions.

Good intentions.

Merlot.

Old Mechanical Engineering Joke:

Male seeks compatible female. Have a large member with a left hand thread. Females with a right hand thread need not apply.

---

Quote: Jimbo Gunn

Biggest love: immunosuppressants, biggest fear: rejection

---

Ha ha ha, this I like.......................

Lost: Mad dog, Lab, answers to Ol' Yeller. Boy's pet.

Shane: Come back!

Rhett: Where shall I go? What shall I do? Scarlett.

Wanted: Seven men to defend mexican village, No women but plenty gold. Death benefits. Must be Magnificent.

Ennis: It's over. Whatever we had last summer is in the past. Please don't try to contact me. I won't respond. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I've finally found out how to quit you. Jack.
P.S.: See you next spring?


Scarlett: Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn. Rhett.

---

Quote: Philbert of Macadamia

---

Quote: Jaggedone

Bin Laden searching for cave woman, must wear Burqa and nothing else!

---

Response:

My name is Jane, I am an older woman. My first husband Tarzan ran off with an ape. What's a Burque?

---

Burqa as is in Burka as in Burkha as in Burqua is something you cannot look into and appears only with female slits.

As for Burk, well POD, you can answer that one.


Well hung, black, called Dick, MOT'd till Nov 2010 searching for white furry, pussy with exploding lips to keep Dick warm and moist, must possess mouth cavity of at least 20 inches!

---

Quote: Jaggedone

---

Quote: Philbert of Macadamia

---

Quote: Jaggedone

Bin Laden searching for cave woman, must wear Burqa and nothing else!

---

Response:

My name is Jane, I am an older woman. My first husband Tarzan ran off with an ape. What's a Burque?

---

Burqa as is in Burka as in Burkha as in Burqua is something you cannot look into and appears only with female slits.

As for Burk, well POD, you can answer that one.


Well hung, black, called Dick, MOT'd till Nov 2010 searching for white furry, pussy with exploding lips to keep Dick warm and moist, must possess mouth cavity of at least 20 inches!

---

Jane here again:

You mean my leopard skin outfit, which accomodates female slits, doesn't count?

Burka's were just never good for swinging through trees. As for Burk, remember I used to live with "The Apeman."

DWM seeks adventurous, laid back young woman whom I can whip into shape.
Hemophiliacs and the squeamish need not apply
- M. de Sade