Discussion Forum

Why is it that when we get a bit of sunshine, fat people feel a need to walk around half dressed?

Why do people start playing tennis?

And wear truly ridiculous clothes?

Is it just me or has the whole world gone mad?

Skoob.

Hmmmmm......it could have something to do with you being a miserable, grumpy old tool.

Jesus Budda's so fat when he sat on a quarter a booger flew out of George Washington's nose!

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Quote: BuckwheatsButt

Jesus Budda's so fat when he sat on a quarter a booger flew out of George Washington's nose!

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And?

Is it a crime to be fat?
Or sit on coins?

Who's the disgusting one: Me or George Washington?
I think you'll find Georgie Porgie is the one with the mucous issues.



Buckwheats?

Sorry about that, I was just calling to see if you could hear me.
Don't play to close to the waters edge now, ok?
And wear your paddles and sun hat, you penis face.

Of course I meant to type 'too close to the edge' - not 'to close to the edge'.


Silly me.


I do the same with there and their.


But the important thing is that you understand the general meaning behind what I was trying to get across.
And you did.
Well, I'm presuming you did.

By 'you' I mean the reader in general.
Not a single individual. Or a general.
Unless of course that reader IS a general.

Would the army really read Jesus Budda's comments?
I think not.

But then again...

Monkey Woods told me that Jesus Budda's so fat he has the only car in town with stretch marks!

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Quote: BuckwheatsButt

Monkey Woods told me that Jesus Budda's so fat he has the only car in town with stretch marks!

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That is nonsense!
Everyone knows I don't drive!

Besides, Monkey Woods would never spread such filthy lies such as that - especially to a hunchbacked, ginger, midget featured, cock gobbler from Florida.





I'm talking about Lt. Horatio Caine in CSI Miami. Monkey Woods has zero contact with him since the 'incident'...

Nobody has come up with a satisfactory answer for fat people behaving like twonks when the sun comes out.

Come to think of it, skinny people are just as bad.

What makes them think anybody's interested in what they look like half dressed?

Unless it's Cindy Crawford.

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Quote: Skoob1999

Nobody has come up with a satisfactory answer for fat people behaving like twonks when the sun comes out.

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I gave you an answer with my first post.


I wish it would snow....

JB

I'm miserable, yes.

I'm old, yes.

But a tool?

Tools are useful son. I can't say that about myslef.

Did you spot the pedantic Monkey Woods bit there?

Well done JB

There's hope for you yet

Regards

Skoob.

Can I come in here?









No? OK then.

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Quote: BuckwheatsButt

Jesus Budda's so fat when he sat on a quarter a booger flew out of George Washington's nose!

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I think you're striking a chord here Buck-funster.

How about those Magic?

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Quote: Skoob1999

Why is it that when we get a bit of sunshine, fat people feel a need to walk around half dressed?

Why do people start playing tennis?

And wear truly ridiculous clothes?

Is it just me or has the whole world gone mad?

Skoob.

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What's your solution, Skoob? Lock fatties up in dark rooms and let them out only after dark? Or only when the temp drops to a previously agreed upon number?

And who would decide which number that is? The town the fat person lives in? Or would it be a national decision? So many questions.

Get a life, Skoob.

My wife's so fat that when I first made love to her I burnt my arse on the lightbulb.

(She'll kill me if she sees this)_

She asked me if I'd taken precautions - I told her I'd chained my ankle to the wash basin.

She told me I didn't have a very large organ. I told her it hadn't played in a cathedral before.

None of these are mine. Some stand up whose name escapes me that I liked.

Send him some points.

Skoob the sexist.

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Quote: Madame Bitters

What's your solution, Skoob? Lock fatties up in dark rooms and let them out only after dark?

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You might be onto something here, MB...

I think that's a splendid idea MB.

Don't know how it eluded me thus far.

Regards

Skoob.

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Quote: Monkey Woods

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Quote: Madame Bitters

What's your solution, Skoob? Lock fatties up in dark rooms and let them out only after dark?

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You might be onto something here, MB...

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Why don't you go grade some book reports, Monkey. Get out your trusty red grading pen and circle, slash and x out those pesky grammar and spelling errors until your heart's content.

MB

Don't go upsetting yourself. It isn't worth it.

I've got a twelve hour shift to face tomorrow with a supervisor who hates me. And a hangover to boot.

All The Best

Skoob.

Grumpy grumpy Madame B.


So........?

Exactly how big are we talking here? Can we have a guess your weight competition?


Let me see..... American, works in a bakery, a Texan, everything in Texas is bigger...........

I'll start the bidding at 220lbs.

Fergus

How the divvil are ya?

I knew, just knew you'd get into this thread at some point.

I've had to drown the old sorrows the last day or two.

Sobriety tomorrow.

Ho hum.

Regards

Skoob.

260 at least!

I refuse to dignify your intrusive, inappropriate questions with an answer. Except to say that I make JB look svelte and slender in comparison.

But that just means there's more of me to love, don't you know?

What gives, Buck? I thought all of you black fellows liked your women big and buxom and flirty.

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Quote: Skoob1999

Why is it that when we get a bit of sunshine, fat people feel a need to walk around half dressed?

Why do people start playing tennis?

And wear truly ridiculous clothes?

Is it just me or has the whole world gone mad?

Skoob.

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MB, you're not a fat person, are you?


I had to edit that, because, instead of the word 'person', there was a rather more derogatory word in there.

Can you guess what it was?

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Quote: Skoob1999

Why is it that when we get a bit of sunshine, fat people feel a need to walk around half dressed?

Answer: perspiring fatties need to air themselves otherwise they start to pong and they don't give a shit about what "normal" sized people think or stink!.

Why do people start playing tennis?

Answer: People play tennis all year but in sommer they venture outside because its warm (strange human behaviour) and want to show off what they never learnt in the hall!!!

And wear truly ridiculous clothes?

Answer: Shodden overcoats reveal the true tastes of the sheep, shitty, apart from those who can afford decent clothes, the minority!

Is it just me or has the whole world gone mad?

Answer: Skoob, you are mad, that we all know, but the whole world is fucking mad, solidarity, except in Alaska, Siberia and Greenland, where it's to(o) fucking cold anyway!